Rating: PG-15
Legal: I don't own any of the characters from the series.
Subtext: None. (I believe Xena and Gabrielle are friends NOTHING more.)
Violence: Well yeah, but nothing more then you'd find in a typical episode.
Sex: Nothing graphic. I just used innuendo such as kissing, backrubs, and stuff like that. If you wish to skip it, then you're going to want to skip ALL of chapter nine and the beginning of chapter ten. Though if you are in any way opposed to Xena and Ares in love this is definitely not your story.
Spoilers: Yes. There's a lot of spoilers, mainly to 'the Quest', 'A Necessary Evil', 'Dreamworker', 'the Gauntlet', and 'Sins of the Past'. Most of the spoilers are in chapter eight.
Thankyou and enjoy, but please don't steal. Though if you ask me to borrow it I'll say go right ahead.
In the Hands of Fate
By Katrina
Chapter 1: Amiss
The moon shone brightly and the stars covered the land with their soft iridescent glow. It was late in August. A strong, unseasonably cold wind was blowing up from the South. Xena and Gabrielle sat wrapped in wool blankets on either sides of a campfire in a clearing within a forest. They sat in silence, hearing only the sounds of crickets, owls, moving leaves, and the crackling of their fire. Xena sat perfectly still, staring into the fire as if she were mesmerized by the swaying flames. Gabrielle was staring at her. "Xena, what's wrong," she asked, trying to search Xena's emotionless eyes for some kind of answer.
"Nothing. What makes you think something's wrong?" she responded, not even looking up.
"Well…ever since we got back from Corinth you haven't said one word to me.... Are you mad at me?"
Xena looked up. "No," she declared almost surprised by the question.
"Then why aren't you talking to me?" Her voice sounded hurt.
"I've just been thinking about all that's happened in the past few days.... But I'm not mad at you. Why would I be?"
"I don't know. I just thought maybe I did something and didn't realize it."
"Of course not. If you did I would have told you."
Gabrielle smiled, picked up her blanket, and sat down next to her. "You're thinking about the gods aren't you?"
"Yeah. I can't figure out why they all suddenly disappeared from the face of the earth. And Callisto, we were in the middle of a fight, then just because Strife whispered something to her, she left…laughing. She never leaves a fight."
"You're right. Something is wrong…and maybe it involves you, but I wouldn't worry about it. Just take one thing at a time."
Xena nodded and sighed. "You're probably right. Let's just try and get some sleep. Maybe I will be able to figure it out in the morning….Goodnight Gabrielle." As Xena said this, she laid down on her blanket and shut her eyes.
"Wait." Xena opened her eyes and looked at Gabrielle, who was leaning over to her. "I have one more question. Honestly, are you frightened by the gods?"
"Depends on which one," she stated propping her head up onto her hand.
"In general."
"In general?" She pondered for a moment, looking up at the star filled sky and then responded, "In a way no and in a way yes. I can't describe it exactly. It isn't the fear of their powers. It's the fear of the unknown. You can never be sure of what they'll do. That's why you must stay alert. Because if they catch you off guard, then you are at their mercy. Does that answer your question?"
"I think so. Goodnight, Xena."
"Night." Gabrielle laid down. Within a short time, she was asleep. Xena on the other hand couldn't sleep. She knew something was wrong. She could sense it. Her body began to stiffen as tension pushed its way into her thoughts. She tried to relieve the ache by exhaling deeply. She needed sleep. Xena hadn't been sleeping well for the past few days. At that moment, she made up her mind. Whatever it was, it would half to wait until morning. With that, she shut her eyes and drifted into a deep sleep.
Lost in a dream,
having no where to go,
Trying to gain some steam,
never knowing my foe.
Waking up in a cold sweat,
nothing is what it seems.
Trying to analyze the threat,
of my shattered dreams.
-T. Somerville
Slowly the young bard opened her eyes, and was greeted by the scent of frying fish.
"Morning Gabrielle," Xena said cheerfully as she watched Gabrielle struggle into a sitting position. Xena was smiling, sitting by the campfire holding the fish over the flames.
"Morning," Gabrielle replied lazily. "I see you're in a good mood. How'd you sleep?" She got up and sat down next to Xena waiting for a reply.
"Actually…quite well. I haven't felt this well rested for at least a month."
"That's good," Gabrielle said as she yawned. "Is that breakfast?"
"Yeah. Hope you're in the mood for trout."
"I like almost everything. It smells great." Xena smiled. "When did you catch them?"
"Before you woke up."
"It's amazing. You even got up before me and you are still more rested."
Xena laughed quietly. "I'm accustomed to a limited amount of sleep." Xena glanced down at the trout. Realizing that they were done, she pulled them out of the fire. "Breakfast is ready," she stated, handing a fish to Gabrielle. Gabrielle took a bite and looked up at the sky. The sun was shining and there were few if any clouds.
"Looks like it'll be a nice day." Gabrielle looked at Xena.
"Yeah. Great traveling weather."
"Where we going?"
"No where in particular, but we can't stay in the woods all day."
"Okay....I'll start packing as soon as I'm done eating."
As soon as they had finished eating and cleaning up camp, they were ready to leave. Xena mounted Argo as Gabrielle picked up her staff. Together, they left the clearing and headed out of the forest.
"Xena, I meant to ask you. Did you ever figure out what the gods are up to?"
"No, so I've got to be ready for anything."
"Well whatever it is, we can handle it."
"We?"
"Of course…. I'm always ready to help out," Gabrielle stated, smiling.
"Thanks," Xena answered. She glanced down at Gabrielle. "I'm glad I can count on you."
"Well what are best friends for?"
Suddenly, Argo came to a halt and started to back up. "Come on boy. What's wrong?" Xena said trying to urge him forward. Her efforts to move the horse proved ineffective. She dismounted and grabbed hold of the Argo's bridle. She continued to edge him on, but the more she tried, the more he moved back.
"What's wrong with him?"
"I don't know," Xena stated. Her voice sounded worried. Gabrielle could tell she was confused by her horse's actions. "I think he's afraid of something ahead."
All of a sudden a spiked metal barrier came crashing to the ground in front of them. Xena and Gabrielle whirled around and stared blankly at the barricade facing them. They were almost killed. It was Argo who saved them. He had sensed it was there. Shaken, they turned around, only to find themselves staring into the faces of eight gods. In front of them stood Strife, Discord, Callisto, Velasca, the Sovereign, Hades, Apollo, and Aphrodite. It was a trap. Callisto stepped forward. "Xena...Xena...Xena, How I've missed you," she said in a mocking sort of way. "I bet you're wondering why we're all here."
"The thought did cross my mind," Xena said back, just as sarcastic.
Callisto smiled. "We all have a surprise for you. Seeing how you are always trying to do good and make people happy, we're going to help you do it."
"I don't understand.... Get to the point. Why are you here?"
"OK. I'll tell you since you asked so politely. Ares' birthday is coming up.... And for years now he's only wanted one thing, but we couldn't give it to him until now. This year is going to be different though. We're joining together to give it a try."
"I'm not seeing your point. What is my part in this birthday gift search?"
"I'm glad you asked. You see, the one gift Ares' wants more than anything else is...you, and we're here to get it for him."
The sun rises into the sky
But the clouds won't let it shine
Darkness fills the naked eye
Stopping the hands of time
My life this can not be
There has to be another way
Still, now that you told me
It's only the start of a sad new day
-D. Luu
*I made some changes*
At that very instant the warrior princess drew her sword and held it out in front of her. "If you think I'm going to be some gift, then think again!" Xena growled.
"Oh Xena, I don't think…I know," Callisto stated, smiling. She looked down at Xena's sword. "Do you honestly think that will help you? You're up against gods. None of us can die...so frankly...the odds aren't in your favor."
"Remember," interrupted Strife, "she is not to be harmed." He was directing his statement mainly at Callisto.
"Oh shut up!" Callisto hissed, glancing back at Strife. "Accidents happen," she stated sweetly. Then she focused her attention on Xena once again. "Besides, she's the one who wants to fight." Xena narrowed her eyes, glanced at both Callisto and Strife, and then at Gabrielle who was standing behind her. Gabrielle's eyes were full of fear, whereas Xena's displayed no emotion.
Velasca stepped forward. "Strife's right, Callisto. We can't hurt Xena...but Gabrielle's a different story."
When Gabrielle heard this, she took a defensive position with her staff.
"Easy for you to say. You want revenge on Gabrielle. I want Xena!" Callisto yelled.
"Enough!...both of you. Gabrielle is our insurance for Xena. We can't kill either of them," declared Strife.
"Who said anything about killing?" Callisto questioned. "I just think some nice torture would do them good." She looked at Xena. "Oh very well. I'll try to contain myself."
"You better," muttered Strife.
Gods have excellent hearing, so Callisto heard him. And anyone could tell Strife was really getting on Callisto's nerves.
"Listen you warrior wannabe. I've had just about enough of you. Never...ever tell me what to do!" Callisto yelled. "Or I'll teach you a lesson you will never forget."
That was it. Callisto had lost her cool, and began a huge argument. It started just between Callisto and Strife, but soon all the gods were yelling at each other, defending whoever was their friend. This gave Xena the opening that she needed. She unnoticeably removed the whip from her armor and signaled to Gabrielle what she was planning to do. Gabrielle took a step forward and grabbed onto Xena's waist. Xena took one last look at Callisto and Strife, before drawing her arm back.
The argument was broken by the crack of Xena's whip, which had been securely fastened to some vines hanging over Xena's head. All the gods turned to look at Xena, who was now smiling. Callisto took a step toward her. "Ha!" Xena yelled as she took a leap with Gabrielle still holding onto her. They sailed over the heads of all eight gods. With a twist of the wrist, she then freed her whip. The gods turned to face them. Argo galloped past the turned heads over to Xena who in turn jumped on as soon as he came near. They left the gods stunned, and within moments they were on their way toward Athens.
Contrary to some beliefs, the gods weren't stupid. OK. Maybe some of them were, but not all. They knew not to follow on foot. They would wait until Xena stopped to take a break, then, they would attack. But Xena knew them too well. She had already developed a plan. It was a plan based on chance, but it was their only hope.
* * * * *
Xena and Gabrielle headed toward the temples of Athens. Xena knew that a god could not enter another god's temple without their permission. So maybe if the temple's patron was her ally, they could seek refuge in the temple and the other gods wouldn't be allowed in.
The first temple they came across was dedicated to Poseidon: god of the sea, but they did not know that. They dismounted and ran through the temple's doors.
Inside, it was nothing but a pool with a tiny rim along the sides where a few offerings were placed. The room was dark and the air held moisture. There were no windows, so sunlight did not touch the soiled ground often. For a temple it was relatively simple. It had no color except for the light blue reflection of the water on the ceiling. Xena and Gabrielle stepped onto the rim, and carefully, by placing one foot after the other, reached the other side.
Suddenly they heard the doors burst open. Xena's expression, which had started to look hopeful, turned blank again. That was how she wanted it. She never showed her true emotions to her opponents. She made a special effort to hide her feelings of fear, anger and sorrow. Never once had she cried before her enemies. The only person who ever saw her true feelings was Gabrielle
"I bet you didn't know Poseidon was aiding us," teased Callisto. Xena and Gabrielle were trapped...again. The gods entered the room and started towards Xena and Gabrielle on either sides of the pool. To make matters worse, since this was Poseidon's temple, he could rise from the pool at any time.
Like their previous confrontation with the gods, they had one or few choices that would enable them to escape. In this case they only had one choice; the other would be a definite loss. They decided to chance it with the water. Xena glanced at Gabrielle. Over the years Xena and Gabrielle had developed a strong friendship and an understanding of each other. Gabrielle seemed to know what they needed to do and nodded in understanding.
When the gods were about half way around the pool, Gabrielle leaped from the ledge and into the cold deep water. The gods paused for a moment, and then continued toward Xena. Ares had requested the capture of the bard to help control Xena, but it was Xena he really wanted. Xena waited till Gabrielle was almost to the other side. She jumped, doing several flips in the air, and landed almost at the other side. While the gods hurried to catch up to them, they climbed out of the water.
"It'll take more than that to catch us!" Xena yelled, laughing, as they left the temple. By the time the gods got outside, Xena and Gabrielle were already on Argo, riding out toward the horizon.
"Stupid Poseidon!" shouted Callisto angrily. "He's probably off destroying a ship or something. He can't be counted upon. See if we give him credit for helping!" With a wave of her hand she disappeared. As did the others.
Xena and Gabrielle decided to stick to the original plan of seeking shelter in the temples. Even though the first one almost got them captured, there was bound to be a temple to a friendly god somewhere around here. They were cold, wet, and hungry. Shelter was needed. They rode throughout the night. Xena sensed the gods were around.
As the sun began to rise in the morning, they could see the dark silhouette of a temple looming in the distance. It was easy to tell if the building was a temple or not. Temples were in like a uniform code. They were all built basically the same way. Of course the colors and furnishings varied, but still they were all similar.
"Whose temple is that?" Gabrielle asked drowsily.
"I'm not sure. It's been several years since I've traveled down this path."
Gabrielle tightened he grip around the warrior. "I don't know about you, but when this is all over with, I think I'll sleep for a month." Xena smiled. She definitely did not look as tired as Gabrielle, but then again she never did.
They reached the temple within minutes and dismounted. Xena sent Argo away with a slight push. She didn't want him to get hurt at her cost. Then Xena and Gabrielle ran inside and bolted the doors shut behind them. Xena exhaled deeply, her hands still resting on the door. "Xena," whispered Gabrielle in a shaky voice. She put her hand on Xena's shoulder and pulled her gently to make her turn around. Xena opened her mouth to reply but became speechless as she gazed upon the sight in front of her. She knew this temple, as did Gabrielle. It belonged to Ares.
Gabrielle spun around and frantically tried to unbolt the door, but Xena grabbed her hand.
"Gabrielle wait! Don't you see? We can use this to our advantage."
"What?! I'm sorry, Xena, but I think you've finally lost it. This is Ares' temple. In what possible way could we use this to our advantage. You're not going to try to kill Ares are you?"
"No. Nothing of the sort. Think about it. The other gods don't want Ares to know that they've teamed up and are trying to capture us. They want to keep it a surprise."
"So?"
"So, they won't follow us in here because Ares will find out. Plus why would they ever think to look for us in here? All we have to do is dress as one of the servant girls, and try to blend in."
"Do you think it will work."
"Have I been wrong yet?"
"Well...what about going into Poseidon's temple?"
"That was an accident. Besides, it wasn't like it was labeled."
"What about going to the other side of that pool."
"We got out of it."
"Well what about..."
"Gabrielle." Xena cut her off. "The point is we're not captured and we're not dead. So my plan has worked up until now."
Gabrielle grabbed Xena's arm and Xena turned to face her and smiled. "I'm only kidding, Xena."
"I know," she replied and smiled too.
We circle eachother to calm out spite
Knowing that it will be one long fight
I draw my sword from its case
Trying to read your emotionless face
The battle begins with my swing at you
You block me, but I block you too
I jump ahead and you fall behind
Winning's the only thing on my mind
I can read your growing frustration
All you can see from me is utter determination
Your sword is slowing
Your head is lowering
Your fire is gone
Now it won't be long
The duel is over for you
There is nothing you can do
The score shows it to be true
One win for me, one loss for you
-C. Blevins
*I made some changes*
Quietly and carefully they slipped into a room that was located down the hall. It seemed like as good a place as any to look for servant clothes. Sure enough, they found a chest full of clothes in the back corner of the room. "All right. Now pick out a dress," Xena stated. While Gabrielle searched through the bin, Xena examined the room. It was a nicely furnished what looked to be a bedroom. It was clean and mainly was the color blue. It was lit by candle light since there was no windows. There was of course a bed – king size – and it had a sofa. It was a typical … Hiram. Xena looked at Gabrielle. "Have you picked one yet?" Gabrielle stopped searching and looked up. Clothes were scattered everywhere.
"I don't like the selection," she replied, whining. Xena sighed.
"Unless you want to get caught, I suggest you pick out a dress," Xena stated seriously.
"If you can call them dresses," Gabrielle mumbled sarcastically, and went back to looking. A few minutes later Gabrielle pulled one out from the pile and held it up. "You know...this would look good on you, Xena." Without even really looking at it, Xena took the dress.
"I don't care what I wear." She walked over to the corner of the room and changed behind something (I don't know what those portable dressing stalls are called that are like a wall that just sits there, but you get the idea.) Xena stepped out after a few minutes. She was wearing a white dress with long sleeves and a short bottom hem line which was laced with gold. It was tight for the upper part but loose for the bottom. She had a veil to cover her mouth and sandal like shoes.
"You know...that looks good on you.... It'll impress Ares."
"Yeah...very funny." She walked over towards Gabrielle and knelt down besides the chest. "And you're going to wear...this." She held up a dress.
"You've got to be kidding!"
"Why not? You got to pick my outfit now I get to pick yours. It's only fair. Besides 'it would look good on you'," she said imitating Gabrielle.
Gabrielle smiled a cocked smile and took the dress. She changed in the corner behind that thing I told you about and then stepped out. She was wearing a full body green dress. It had straps instead of sleeves. She too was wearing a veil and sandals.
"Now that I see this dress, it really isn't that bad," she said looking down at herself. "I mean at first I...."
"Gabrielle," Xena interrupted, "before you start telling me a story, tell me, do we still have those blonde and black wigs?"
"Huh?"
"You know the one you had when you thought I died and you tried to play the part. And the one I wore for that beauty contest."
"Oh yeah....I think so. Why?"
"Because I'm wearing the blonde one and you're wearing the black one."
"Oh I see. No one will recognize us. All right. Let me see if I can find them on Argo's saddle bag."
"After you're done, put Argo away in hiding. Maybe by some waterfall or something. I thought I saw one while we were coming here. I don't want Ares to find him."
"OK." She left the room. Xena walked over to a full sized mirror in the other side of the bed. "Well...it's not really me...but it'll have to do. And anyway, It's not supposed to be me," she said quietly to herself.
"I got 'em, Xena," Gabrielle proclaimed as she entered the room. She walked up to Xena and handed her the blonde wig, keeping the black one for herself. They both put them on then looked in the mirror.
"Well we certainly are disguised," Xena remarked. "Are you ready?" She made the final touchups on her outfit.
"You know...one thing is going to give you away. You have to learn to act like a blonde."
Xena laughed. "And you have to be serious. Well I'm ready."
"Me too."
"Then lets go." With that, they left the room and started down a long hallway.
Moments later they heard a voice from behind them exclaim, "Hurry! You don't want to be late!" They turned to see a servant girl dashing down the corridor and rushing past them.
'At least our disguises work,' Xena thought.
Neither Xena nor Gabrielle had ever been in this temple, so they just followed the girl. She led them to a throne room. Dark, it was, made of stone. The throne was the only piece of furnishing within room. Even that was dark red. There was what appeared to be offerings that surrounded the throne. The objects ranged from food to flowers. Weapons hung from the wall. Total there was about ten servant girls present in the room. They were all lined in a straight line in front of the throne. Suddenly there was a loud gong. The girls knelt down. Of course Xena and Gabrielle did the same. They did not want to stand out in any way. Unfortunately, Gabrielle already did. She was the only one in a full length dress. All of the others wore outfits close to what Xena was wearing.
There was a flash of light as Ares materialized on the throne. One of the other girls stood up. "Lord Ares, is there anything we can get for you?" she inquired.
"Just my lunch," he replied. She nodded left to get his request. Ares seemed tired, frustrated, and more importantly, distracted. This was an advantage for Xena. The girl returned, carrying a tray full of food. He took the plate and dismissed the girl. She returned to the line of girls. Xena glanced at her as the girl walked back to her place. It was interesting to see the way they had everything so precisely planned out, from every move to the order in which they stood. It reminded her of army ranks on a battle field – well what else could you expect from the god of war.
"All right. Get back to work," Ares said as he began to eat the food. Each of the servant girls spread out to a different part of the room. Again Xena and Gabrielle just followed another girl. Mimicking her, they began to take the food and gifts scattered along the throne room and put them on top of ledges that were on three of the four walls of the room.
Eventually Xena began to feel uneasy. Someone was watching her. She turned to see whatever it was that was unnerving her. It was Ares. He had stopped eating, rested his head on the palm of his hand and was staring at her. She couldn't work under anyone's watchful eye, so trying hard not to draw attention to herself, she walked to the reverse side of the throne and began to fill the ledges there. She wondered if Ares recognized her or had he just never seen her before and was curious. There was no way to find out without getting caught, so she made up her mind to try her best to avoid him.
Once the floor was clean of gifts, the girls left the room and an army entered. Xena could not hear all that was being said on account of the girls' chit chat and the volume at which the army was talking, but the last word she was able to make out was "war." She decided that the room must be used for war councils. It actually didn't matter to her if there was going to be a war. She had enough troubles of her own for the moment, and besides, it kept Ares occupied.
She had followed the girls to their sleeping area. When everyone was inside , she heard a click and turned towards the sound. It was the door. They were locked in. Minutes later Gabrielle walked up to her. "Now what?" she asked, looking around the room.
"Just … blend in." When Xena saw the still worried expression on her friend's face she said, "Don't worry. We'll be fine."
Gabrielle smiled. "You may be fine, but I don't know about me." She paused and glanced around to make sure no one was close enough to her their conversation. She turned back to Xena and began to scratch her head. "I don't know about you, but this wig is killing me." They both started laughing.
"You're new around here aren't you," said a voice from behind them. They turned to see the girl they had followed into the throne room.
"Yeah.... We are," Xena replied.
"I'm Thea."
"I'm...Celeste and this is...um...."
"Sara," Gabrielle interrupted.
"Nice to meet you," Thea stated.
"You too," Xena responded.
"I just wanted to say that if you have any questions at all, please don't hesitate to ask. I know how crazy it was on my first day here, so if there's anything you need, just ask."
Xena smiled. "Thank you."
After Thea went back to her bed Gabrielle turned to Xena.
"Celeste?"
"Yeah. What's wrong with it? I've always liked that name...Sara."
"You know, now we have to keep these aliases."
"I know." Xena looked around the room. Most of the other girls were already in bed or almost ready for it. Xena and Gabrielle were lucky. There were a few extra beds, so they wouldn't stand out. "I think we'd better get ready....Don't want to draw attention now do we?"
"No, but there seems to be a small flaw in your plan."
"And what's that."
"We don't have any other clothes! And it'll look awfully funny if we're seen wearing the exact same pair of clothes day in day out."
"Calm down. We'll just have to borrow some." She looked around the room. "Why don't you ask Thea?"
"Yeah sure and tell her what? That we're actually Xena and Gabrielle, but we just happen to be posing as some servant girls to avoid nine other gods who are trying to turn us into birthday gifts for their almighty god, Ares. Yeah, that'll work."
"Maybe. How bout just saying that we thought clothes were going to be supplied."
Gabrielle said what Xena said to say, and sure enough, Thea gave clothes for both Xena and Gabrielle. She was just about Xena's size, so there was no problem there. Gabrielle on the other hand was about four sizes too small for her clothes, but she dealt with it. By the time they got ready, they were the last ones to fall asleep.
In the morning Xena and Gabrielle were woken up at six a.m. They were assigned to make Ares breakfast, and help with the throne room cleaning like they had done the first day. It was fairly easy enough except for the minor problem that Xena couldn't cook, but they survived. Things went on like this for three days, but on the afternoon of the fourth day something went wrong.
Gabrielle was setting up the throne room when suddenly she tripped, falling to the floor. Her wig went flying off in front of the throne, which would not have been so bad except Ares was present and sitting right in front of her when it happened. He was the first to see it. He walked up to her and grabbed her arm. After staring at her for a few minutes he said, "Gabrielle?!" Xena couldn't tell if she was more in shock or if Ares was. But his look of surprise soon turned into a sly smile. He called his guard and whispered, "If Gabrielle is posing as a servant girl, chances are, Xena is too." He looked around the room at the all the girls. "Make sure all the girls in this castle are in here and lock all possible ways out." Ares got up and roughly pulled Gabrielle to her feet. She looked as if she would faint. Her handed Gabrielle to another guard in the room. The first guard returned with two other girls and locked the door.
"All right girls, I want you to line up single file facing me."
They did as they were told. Xena purposely got towards the end of the line. She tried her hardest to keep a confused yet calm look on her face. But the truth was, she was very worried. One by one the girls were taken by Ares. She couldn't see what he was doing because they were blocked by the throne and one by one they were sent away. Xena guessed he was checking their hair since that was Gabrielle's give away.
Eventually the time came for Xena's turn. She took a slow step towards him and he took her hand, leading her behind the throne. She avoided looking into his eyes. Her blue eyes were kind of her give away. Xena felt her heart start to beat faster as he lifted her head with his hand till they were eye level and he was able to look into her deep blue eyes. Her mind was racing with thoughts. Should she run? If she did would the other gods still be outside? But most of all, did he recognize her?
Suddenly, in one motion, he pulled Xena's wig off, pulled her close to him, and kissed her. She was literally frozen because of his sudden and passionate response. After the kiss he once again pulled her back to look into her eyes. "Hello, Xena." He grasped her hands tightly and was not about to let go. "Charade's up."
I don't care what you say
It's not you I have to obey
I do not care what you do
I will see my life through
You can threaten me all day
But I wouldn't have it any other way
You may think you still have a claim on me
But that thought is wrong, you'll see
I was never fully yours - at your command
Nor was I meant to be punished by your hand
We were together once long ago
But that was an empty love that you didn't even show
Now all that is gone
So I ask you, why do you still consider me your pawn
And yet you pursue me still
And I guess you always will
Until finally one day
After years of playing this keep away
I will submit to your charm
And once again open myself...to your seductive harm
-Me (Katrina)
Xena stared coldly into Ares' eyes. "The charade might be over…but the game's still in play," she replied. Gathering her strength, Xena pulled her right hand free from his grasp and delivered a powerful jab into his mid-section. He released her other wrist as he buckled over in pain. If he had been a mortal, that blow would have surely broken a rib. Since he was a god it only slowed him down. Ares was back on his feet moments later, but that little bit of time was all the time Xena needed to make her move. "Ayiyiyiyiyiyiy!" She leaped into the air and did a double back flip, landing neatly on her feet right beside Gabrielle. Xena elbowed the guard holding Gabrielle in the kidney, causing him to let go. Then, grabbing his arm, she flipped him over her shoulder so he was unconscious on the floor.
Xena turned to her friend. "Gabrielle, I want you to go gather our things."
"OK," she replied and ran towards the hallway. By now, Ares had already commanded ten of his best guards to capture the warrior princess and the bard. All at once, they charged at Xena, who easily flipped over them, and began to fight each individually. She had already grounded most of the men when Gabrielle came running up to her.
"Here," she yelled as she tossed Xena her chakram. Xena caught it, aimed for a second, and threw. It knocked out the remaining guard and hit the metal latch on the door, breaking the lock.
"Get out now!" Xena shouted as she began to race towards it. Once they got outside, Xena whistled for her horse. Argo came running. He was really a well-trained horse. They mounted him and rode off.
"They're getting away you idiot!" Callisto shouted at the sleeping Strife. He was asleep right by the door Xena had just escaped from. Callisto kicked him in the side. Strife yawned, pulled himself off the ground and looked up at the fuming goddess. He guessed what had happened and they both disappeared.
But Xena and Gabrielle were already well away from that temple and heading towards the next one.
* * * * *
When the temple came into view Gabrielle turned to Xena. "Do you know whose temple this is?"
"It belongs to Zeus," she stated unenthusiastically.
Gabrielle's eyes shot wide open. "The king of the gods?!" Gabrielle asked in her 'bard-like' voice.
"The same," Xena responded.
"Well…is he our friend or not."
"I don't know. I don't even know if any of the gods are on our side, but we need a place for food and shelter. We don't really have that much of a choice in the matter. It's all based on luck."
The temple had huge metal doors which Xena and Gabrielle barricaded once they were inside. Tired, they walked towards the front of the temple and collapsed onto one of the pews. They had almost fallen asleep when suddenly they heard the doors burst open.
"Honey, I'm home!" Callisto exclaimed happily as she stood blocking the doors with the other gods. Xena and Gabrielle crouched down in their seat to avoid being seen. Xena heard the footsteps come closer. "Oh come on, Xena. I know you're here. Just come out. We're all getting really tired of this game and we do have some accommodations to arrange." Knowing that they would find them anyway, Xena stood up and walked out into the aisle in front of Callisto. "Now that's a good girl. Let's do this as easily as possible. Just surrender. You know Ares won't hurt you. Is avoiding him really worth this much aggravation?"
"It's the principle of the matter that counts. It's a matter of pride and freedom, which I won't give up without a fight."
"Suit yourself," Callisto responded and drew her sword as Xena did the same.
Suddenly there was a flash of light as a man materialized within it. Everyone turned to look. He took a step forward. "How dare you!" the man yelled at the gods before him. "Who gave you permission?! You can't just enter my temple especially in this manner."
"Zeus," Xena unknowingly said out loud. She was both relieved and a little frightened. She had never actually seen the king of the gods – only in pictures.
"We didn't mean to enter in such a disrespectful manner," stated Strife, trying to apologize. "We were just chasing...."
"Xena and Gabrielle. I know very well who it is you are chasing," Zeus said finishing his sentence. "First of all, that still doesn't give you an excuse to rectify your behavior. Second of all, these two women have come to my temple to seek refuge from those of you who pursue them." He glanced meaningfully at Xena and Gabrielle. "As long as they are here, they are under my protection. As for you...get...out!"
One by one the other gods glumly exited the temple. Callisto was the last to leave. She still didn't even loose her look of pleasure as she left. She just smiled and said, "You've gotta come out some time, and Zeus can't protect you forever. I mean look how close we've gotten to Hercules and he's Zeus' son." Callisto's words did find their mark. Xena knew that they couldn't stay here forever and they may never get a moment of peace outside again, but she pushed these thoughts out of her mind. The last thing that they needed right now was a negative attitude.
Xena looked Zeus over and smiled. "Thanks."
"You're welcome." He paused and then started walking toward the front of the temple. "I will provide food for you and Gabrielle while you're here. Should you need anything, just call out my name and I will come as soon as I can."
"Why are you doing this for us," Gabrielle asked stepping out from behind Xena. Xena shot her a harsh look. "Sorry," she replied softly as a look of guilt crossed her face and she remembered what Xena had told her. Never ask a god a question especially when they are doing something nice for you. Don't let them think you are at all confused or they will take advantage of you. Still, that question was prominent in Xena's mind as well. She had never offered any sacrifices to him Zeus and never paid him homage.
"Because I hate what Ares has done...or what he's doing for that matter. He has people – gods no less – chasing you relentlessly and for what? A birthday gift! People are not meant to be gifts. Besides you're only mortals. What do you honestly think your chances are at winning this fight?" Xena shrugged – knowing fully well their chances. "Not very good," he stated. With that, he disappeared.
Gabrielle turned to her friend. "Do you think we can trust him?"
"I don't know...but if he was not on our side, he would have handed us over already."
Gabrielle nodded. "Xena, what are we going to do?"
"For the moment…exactly what we're doing. I suggest you try to get some sleep."
"All right."
They fell asleep as soon as they laid down — into the dream world, their only place to relax – and the night went on.
* * * * *
As usual, Xena woke up first. She sat up and stretched her arms. A small groan escaped her lips. By the gods, she felt so much better – well, not exactly by the gods. She was still hungry though. It had been about three weeks since she'd taken time out and had the time to eat a decent meal. Looking around, Xena saw that food had already been placed on the table. She smiled, knowing that Zeus had kept his word.
"Xena?" came a voice from behind her. She looked at the bard who was now sitting upright, yawning. "Is all that food for us?"
"Just like you, Gabrielle," Xena said smiling. "The first thing on your mind every morning is food."
'Where's breakfast', 'whattcha eating', 'when are we having breakfast' were Gabrielle's common terms of good morning to Xena.
"Hey." She playfully gave the warrior a push. "Is that breakfast? I want to know."
"Yep."
Gabrielle yawned again and casually strolled over to the food. Xena watched as Gabrielle grabbed an apple and devoured it within a few seconds, practically inhaling it. And then a pear, a banana, and a carrot. Xena held back her urge to laugh.
She had always gotten a good chuckle each morning when she watched her best friend eat. It seemed as though she was still asleep and never even stopped for air. Finally Xena could hold it no longer. She burst out laughing.
Gabrielle turned and looked innocently at her. "What's so funny," she asked, her mouth still full of food. It actually amazed Xena how Gabrielle could always eat so much and never even seem to gain a pound.
Xena breathed in deeply. Laughing had almost brought tears to her eyes. "Nothing" was all she could manage to get out. Gabrielle just shrugged and continued to eat. "Gabrielle," Xena said laying a hand on the bard's shoulder, "don't ever change." Then she began to eat too.
In time they finished the tray of food. Now satisfied, they walked over to the window and peered outside. The Sovereign was still outside. It was almost scary how close a resemblance the Sovereign bore to Hercules. He had set up a camp, and was on his back resting. Luckily all the other gods had disappeared.
"Xena, what are we going to do next?" For a moment Xena just stood there as if she hadn't even heard the question, but then she turned to Gabrielle and smiled. Gabrielle saw that little sparkle in her eye and knew that she had thought of something. "You've got an idea."
"Yes I do…but it's risky and I'll need your help."
* * * * *
Meanwhile, back on Olympus, the gods who were involved with the chase had called together a meeting. No one was able to hear anything over the constant arguing and yelling of the gods.
"We've got no choice. We have to wait until they come out," shouted Discord so she would be heard over the commotion.
"We don't have that much time available to us. Uncle's birthday is next week, and we have no idea of how long they will be holding up in there," stated Strife. "Does Xena even know when Ares' birthday is?"
"I seriously doubt it," replied Callisto. "I mean when's the last time they sat down together and had a little heart to heart chat? Not recently."
"Good."
"Seriously people, how hard can it be for nine gods…well eight gods and one immortal to capture two mere mortals?" Apollo proclaimed.
"That's what makes this whole situation so depressing," whined Discord.
"But this isn't just any mortal. This is Xena we're talking about," yelled Callisto. "It's not like catching any regular mortal like her pesky little brat of a friend. And we haven't even been able to catch her."
"Well whose fault is that?" Velasca asked angrily, looking directly at Strife.
"Don't look at me. I didn't do anything."
"Yeah sure. That sounds really funny coming from the god who let them easily escape from the door he was supposed to be guarding," she replied.
"Well what's done is done. So how will we capture Xena and Gabrielle?"
There was a moment of silence. "I've got it!" exclaimed Callisto. "All we need to do is capture the bard and Xena will fall right into our hands." She smiled. "And really, how hard do you think it will be to capture her?"
"Pretty hard, considering Xena will protect her," answered Strife.
"Not necessarily," Callisto replied, rising from her seat. "All we must do is divide them…even for a moment. Do that and well...we've won. The key to defeating Xena is through her emotions. She feels too much, and we can use that against her. Like Caesar used to say, before Xena killed him that is...divide and conquer."
* * * * *
"So what's your plan? You did say you have a plan, right?" Gabrielle asked excitedly.
"I said I do. Now listen. Do you remember when I got shot with that poison dart and you had to dress up as me to save that village and stop the warlord?"
"Yeah.... How could I forget? I thought you had died."
"Well obviously I didn't. Anyway, I can dress as you and you as me, since they most likely have both exits guarded."
"What good will that do?"
"Just listen.... Strife said you'd just be insurance, so they're after me, right?"
"Right."
"So, if you dress as me and I as you and we each go out a different door we'll have created a diversion."
"I'm not sure I follow you, Xena."
"OK. You ride out the front door on Argo dressed as me, and I'll go out the back door dressed as you. Seeing that you look like me, they'll all go after you, which will give me time to escape."
"So you plan to sacrifice me for your own safety?!"
"No, of course not. Now listen! I'm not done yet. They'll eventually catch you of course, but once they see that they have the wrong person, they'll leave you and go chase after me. Hopefully by then I'll be gone. We can set up a scheduled place to meet up and by then we'll probably have lost them by then, or if not have them very much confused."
"Do you think it'll work?"
"You know, you ask me that a lot. But anyway most likely...if everything goes right. Do you want to try it or not? It's really up to you."
"Well...I wouldn't say this is one of your best plans, Xena, but it's so crazy...and stupid really...that it just might work. So why not? Let's give it a go. As you said we can't stay here forever."
"OK then. Let's wait until dark. It'll be harder to tell who's who. For now, try and get some sleep."
"But I'm not tired."
"You will be."
Again they settled to rest on the benches, which we're exactly that comfortable. For someone who wasn't tired, Gabrielle was out like a light. Xena on the other hand, couldn't. She tossed and turned. She had one of her 'something's wrong' feelings, but she couldn't quite place her finger on it. As she was about to drift off, she detected a presence near by. Xena immediately sat up as her reflexes took over and she peered into the shadows of the temple. Someone appeared.
"I'm sorry. Did I wake you?" Xena exhaled a deep relieved sigh, and stood up to face Zeus.
"No. I've been up."
"Well I just wanted to say you're welcome to stay for a few more nights. You don't have to leave yet."
"So you heard us talking." Zeus nodded. "And you also know what we plan to do." Zeus nodded again. Xena paused, trying to get a handle on the thoughts stirring in her mind. "Do you know what will happen? Will Gabrielle come out okay? That's my main worry." Her voice sounded almost pleading with just a hint of desperation.
"I can't say. I'm sorry to say I can't. I never had that ability. In fact, I don't think any god does."
"Well thanks anyway. And you know how much Gabrielle and I appreciate you letting us stay here."
"You're welcome. But I still don't understand why you want to leave."
"We can't hide all our lives. We...I have to put an end to this. I won't risk Gabrielle."
"You're very brave.... Foolish, but brave." Xena smiled. "Well since you insist on leaving I won't stand in your way. But first, give me your hands."
"Why?"
"Are you mortals always this suspicious? I have a gift to give you."
Xena rose an eyebrow, but conceded and reluctantly placed her hands in his. Immediately she felt him tighten his hold. After a moment, Xena's body jerked. It wasn't exactly what one might consider to be painful, but it was uncomfortable. A shimmer of light surrounded them both. Xena felt stronger and more refreshed. When he released her hands, the glow vanished.
"What did you do to me?"
"I gave you my gift." Xena stared blankly at the god. "Actually I have bestowed upon you two gifts. You are now immortal." Xena's mouth almost dropped to the floor. "And...you also have the power to heal. But there's more to it. The beginner's stage of immortality might not give you the ability to immediately get up after you've been killed…you must let your powers grow first. To heal someone, they must be living. Just hold your hands above that person and concentrate. But I must warn you though, that does take some energy and you will feel slightly fatigued after you do this. This might help you keep Gabrielle safe since that is your biggest worry. At least now you will have a fighting chance." With that, he disappeared. Xena stood there for several minutes, just staring blankly at the empty space where Zeus had just been.
Quietly she replied, "Thanks," and smiled, knowing he heard her. 'Now we have a chance,' she thought to herself. Xena lay back down on the hard wood and this time, fell asleep.
* * * * *
"Xena…Xena." Xena felt someone shake her shoulders. She slowly opened her eyes. Gabrielle stared apologetically down at her. "I didn't want to wake you. You looked so peaceful, but it's time." A wave of thoughts came back to Xena as she remembered the chase and the incident from last night. She was immortal. Xena decided that it would be better if she waited till this ordeal was over with before she told Gabrielle. Knowing what they had to do, she sat up, fairly certain that that was the last good sleep she would have for a long time.
They each separated and went to quickly give themselves a wardrobe change. They couldn't help but laugh at the way the other person looked. "You ready?" Xena asked, unsure if she herself was.
"Let's get this done so was can put this whole nightmare behind us."
Xena nodded and they each went to their door. "On three I want you to mount Argo and ride as fast as you can. Don't stop no matter what you see or hear. They'll use all sorts of trickery to catch us. Meet me at that waterfall...you know, where Argo was. Do you remember how to get there?"
"Yep."
"Good. One…two…three!" They bolted out the doors. Xena was on a running breakaway heading for the falls and Gabrielle was already well on her way too.
"Oh why did I agree to this?!" Gabrielle whined to herself. She and Argo didn't really get along that well but she clung to that horse for dear life. Argo was the one doing the steering. Gabrielle was just trying to stay aloft. Suddenly, there was a flash of light and the feeling of the cold hard ground underneath her back. She groaned at the incredible feeling of pain in her spine and ankle. Argo had thrown her! She turned to see the mare riding away at top speed. Gabrielle blinked, unable to believe what had just happened.
But when she saw the figure towering over her, she knew what had happened. It was Callisto and she had scared Argo. That would at least explain the flash of light she saw.
"Gabrielle?" Callisto sounded as if she didn't even believe her own words. She stared hard at Gabrielle before she smiled and started to laugh. "What is this supposed to be a new look for you?" she said putting her hands on her hips. "Personally, I like the style , you know leather and all, but I think it's more becoming on Xena."
Gabrielle remained silent, afraid she might somehow give away some information as to Xena's whereabouts. Callisto leaned down and pulled Gabrielle roughly to her feet. "Strife!" she exclaimed. He appeared instantly. "I want you to handle her and come with me." He gripped Gabrielle's arms while Callisto let go. Callisto laughed to herself. "Can't wait to see what Xena looks like." With a wave of her hand, all three vanished.
Xena hadn't stopped running since they started, but came to an abrupt halt when she saw the three figures appear in front of her.
Gabrielle has held by Strife with a knife at her neck and Callisto stood in front of them, smiling – like she ever stops. "And Xena, I think you look better in that," she said pointing over her shoulder at the bard. Xena faked a smile as she stared defiantly into Callisto's playful eyes. She really held no fear for this psychotic blonde goddess standing in front of her. Though she was fully aware of the harm she could do unto her, she was not afraid to die. She was however, afraid for her friend.
Callisto started pacing around the warrior. "I should thank you.... You made our job easier. You split up all by yourselves. We didn't have to make you.... Not that you didn't put up a good fight." She stepped in front of Xena. "You gave us all a good workout. But enough games. Come with me. We haven't got much time to get you ready." Callisto took a step in the opposite direction. Seeing that Xena did not intend on moving, she quickly pulled out a dagger and held it against Gabrielle's already hard pounding chest. "Unless you'd rather she die."
Xena took in a sharp intake of breath. She was hit where she was most vulnerable: Gabrielle. "All right," Xena replied desperately. She took a step towards Callisto. "Just don't hurt her."
"I won't as long as you cooperate. Come."
Callisto held out her hand. Xena didn't even want to look at Callisto. Xena didn't want to see the light of victory that she knew was shining in her eyes. Defeated, Xena placed her hand in Callisto's.
No rack can torture me
My soul's at liberty
Behind this mortal bone
There knits a bolder one
Two bodies therefore be
Bind one, and one will flee
The eagle of his nest
No easier divest
Except thyself may be
Thine enemy
Captivity is consciousness
So's liberty
-E. Dickinson
*I left some parts out*
"So where are we going?" Xena asked Callisto. She hated the fact that she was blindly following Callisto's lead. In fact she never liked to rely on anyone let alone her arch enemy. Callisto glanced back at the disheartened warrior princess and smirked. Xena didn't even look up.
"You'll see.... Trust me." She gave the chain connected to Xena's wrists a strong jerk which sent Xena stumbling forward. However, she was back on her feet a moment later. Xena tried in futility to break the bonds which held her wrists. It was impossible because they were made of Hephaestus's metal and the metal made by the god's could not be broken, not even by Hercules himself.
They traveled in this manner down that rocky path for what must have been two days. On that second day they came to an abandoned palace. "We're here!" Callisto exclaimed. She paused for a moment in front before she headed in, pulling Xena and Gabrielle with her.
Xena and Gabrielle were taken into a room where the other gods were seated around a table. Xena heard the door lock behind them. Strife released Gabrielle from her restraints as Callisto unlocked Xena's. Xena glanced at Gabrielle and at the door, but Callisto caught her glare. "Don't even think about escape, Xena." Xena didn't even have to say anything because Callisto somehow knew what she was thinking. "The doors are sealed with Hephaestus's metal too. Only the key can open them." Xena narrowed her eyes. When she still didn't respond, Callisto added, "Are you ready to begin?"
"Begin what?"
"The preparation. You and Gabrielle can't be given to Ares as a gift looking like this. I mean Gabrielle looking like you, you looking like Gabrielle. That just doesn't cut it. But don't worry. We'll get you fixed up."
"What do you mean 'fixed up'?" Gabrielle questioned.
"You know. Hair...makeup...clothes...the works! To be a gift, you gotta be pretty.... Follow me." Callisto gestured for them to follow. Knowing that they would have no chance of escape, they followed her lead. Once they were inside the little room, the door locked and Callisto disappeared.
The room was like a sauna, having a high humidity level. A hot tub was situated in the center. There were no guards, only a few girls cleaning the room. One girl approached them.
"Are you Xena and Gabrielle?"
"Yes. Do we know you?" replied Xena.
"I'm Tessa. No, you probably don't know me, but I've been told to expect your arrival." Some of the other girls also walked up to Xena and Gabrielle. "It's our job to get you ready." Xena sighed. Callisto had carefully planned this out. She knew that Xena would fight any guard who tired to lay a hand on her, but a defenseless girl.... Xena would cooperate. "So are you ready?"
"Can you give us one minute." Tessa nodded and Xena turned to Gabrielle.
"So are we going to go though with this?" Gabrielle asked.
"We don't really have much of a choice.... Besides, a little cleanup would do us good." They both smiled.
"You're probably right."
"Of course. We'll just get out of this whole situation later."
So they went through with it. They washed their hair, took a bath, brushed their teeth, had their hair styled, were dressed in a fancy ensemble, and had makeup/jewelry applied to them.
Xena and Gabrielle looked at themselves in the mirror. They did not look at all like the way they did when they arrived. They almost looked regal. Xena wore her hair down. It was curled at the ends, but was still controlled. As for makeup, she only had on dark red lipstick. She guessed that the other gods thought that Ares wouldn't like a lot on her. To him she was perfect. She was wearing a short red gown. It was made of satin and was rimmed with diamonds. It was held up by little straps on the shoulders. She still had on the same sandals that she came in with. Around her neck was a small, red, heart-shaped diamond that was encircled with smaller white diamonds.
Gabrielle had her hair pulled up in a bun. She had on a pinkish lipstick and green eye shadow. She was wearing a short, gold-colored dress with long sleeves. It was actually plain compared to Xena's, but then again Xena's was supposed to look better. She was the gift. Gabrielle was the insurance.
Xena looked over at Gabrielle. "I think they may have over done it...just a bit." They both laughed.
"I think you're right."
"Well it looks like you're ready," said a voice from behind them. Callisto. "All set to be gift, Xena?" They turned to face her. It was obvious that she was enjoying this. "Well no time to dawdle. Come on."
Xena and Gabrielle exchanged glances before following the goddess. "So now where are we going?" Gabrielle timidly asked Callisto.
"To finish the final steps in getting you ready."
"You mean there's more?"
"Well we can't just have you two waltz right on in there only to have you run right back out again. I know you'd find a way to escape, Xena, so we'll just have to work extra hard to make sure that doesn't happen."
They walked down another hallway, longer than the first. Callisto pushed open the heavy door at the end. They were greeted by the morning's sunlight. Xena's gaze set firmly on the two objects sitting neatly on the grass in front of them. "You two will be traveling in style," Callisto stated happily when she saw the look on Xena's face. Tormenting Xena was her absolute favorite past time.
Finally, after a good struggle, two threats on Gabrielle's life, three attempts at running away, four naughty words, five punches in a Callisto's jaw, six high flying kicks at Velasca, and a good jab into Strife's stomach, they managed to get Xena in the one cage and Gabrielle in the other.
Surprisingly, the cages were quite nicely furnished. They were made of a mixture of silver and Hephaestus's metal. They had a purple velvet lining on the bottom. It even had a small matching pillow in the corner. Xena and Gabrielle were actually comfortable even though the cages were a little bit too small.
Callisto covered the two cages separately with sheets and put them on little wheels. She obviously didn't want any communication between them. She wasn't taking any chances. Callisto knew what Xena was capable of especially when she felt that her best friend was in danger.
With a heave and a groan, they were on the road, headed towards Ares' temple. Heading towards the party where they were going to be the gifts and the main source of entertainment for the god of war.
Stars glimmer south reaching out and touching sea
Nighttime holds nothingness, all spirits are set free
Glittering glory and silence encircles all the sound
Commotion suspended all souls held, Earth bound
Angels within the harvest, yet some linger here on Earth
Some babies wane and disappear soon after birth
Daydreams crushed beneath heavy sodden clouds
Night screams are seldom heard, most smothered in shrouds
Tumultuous as thunder and impatient as rain
We pass on our legacies as we move on from the pain
Time heals all sometimes, at times it heals some
Yet night always fades away, leaving nothing but the sun
-J. Lehman
The road to the temple was a long one with many twists and turns. For the most part, Xena and Gabrielle just sat quietly in their cages, except for the occasional grunt when they were throne into the bars from a sharp turn. Xena did not just sit though, in her mind she had already formulated a plan. She did indeed have a way out of her cage.
The gods had forgotten about the little dagger she kept hidden in between her breasts. It was a gift given – well it was more like something she took away – from Gabrielle right before she had been captured by Morpheus. Xena smiled, remembering the lecture she had given Gabrielle about carrying a sword and becoming a target. She sighed deeply. 'Enough reminiscing,' Xena thought. 'Time to deal with the matter at hand.'
She removed the little knife from its hiding place. It was relatively new compared to the rest armor. She shoved the pointed end into the lock at the front of the cage. With a twist of the wrist, the lock clicked. She was free. Still, she had to think of some way to get Gabrielle out. Xena resolved to wait until they reached the castle before she tried to rescue her companion. As for right now, she needed to get herself out of the cage without being seen.
Carefully, she slit the sheet by the loose door open, making sure to keep the door shut so it wouldn't be as obvious. She peeked out. 'This proves it. People must really become stupider as gods. That or just plain careless,' she thought. They are highly over rated. The opening to the door was facing the back which was unguarded. 'This is going to be easy," she thought, smiling.
* * * * *
Ares sat impatiently in his throne, one leg draped over the arm rest. He was playing with one of his daggers, upset about having to miss a war council because of this pointless party.
Strife nervously paced the room in front of the throne. "They'll be here, I promise you."
"Well I hope for your sake you're right." He paused. "Cause I'm not waiting here much longer. This had better be worth it."
"Oh it is." Strife knew fully well that his uncle had no idea of what his gift would be. But he had wanted the warrior princess for a long time. This would make his day.
"Sorry we're late," announced Callisto as she strolled casually through the door way. Strife sighed a sigh of relief. He stopped pacing and walked over to the two large boxes which were pulled in behind the goddess. "We had a little trouble with the…uh…wrapping paper."
"Understood. Well, what is it?" questioned Ares. Strife smiled at his uncle's curiosity. The mere size of the boxes had intrigued him. Ares walked over to Strife, arms folded across his chest.
"Uncle, allow me to present you with these two gifts on behalf of the other gods." He paused for effect. "For your first gift, here is Gabrielle, bard of Podedia." As he said this, he removed the sheet from Gabrielle's cage. She was seated in the far corner of the cage, curled into a little ball. She looked up at the smiling gods in fear.
"Impressive," replied Ares, amused. He was starting to get excited. He had a pretty good idea of what the second gift would be, and was looking forward to it immensely.
"And for your second gift, I present to you… your own creation…the warrior princess…Xena!" He tore off the sheet from Xena's cage.
"Is this supposed to be funny?" snarled Ares as his face suddenly grew very angry. The puzzled gods peered into the cage. Xena was gone.
"I don't understand. She was here…right here," yelled Strife. The other gods began to frantically search around the room.
Their search came to an abrupt stop when they heard a voice from the background call out, "You know, it helps to remove someone's weapons before you try to confine them." All of the gods turned towards the voice. Xena was calmly perched on a windowsill on the side wall. Her feet dangled carelessly of the edge of the sill that was about twenty feet in the air. It was a big temple. Her hand held the side of the window as she looked down at the gods and smiled at Gabrielle. Ares' look had softened as he smiled up at his chosen.
"How did you get out?! That cage was made of Hephaestus's metal!" shouted Strife.
"True, but as I said, it helps to take someone's weapons first."
"But we did."
"Ha!" Gingerly, she removed the dagger from her bodice and held it up for all to see. "Well what do you call this? Jewelry?"
"Well at least you eventually did decide to grace us with your presence," Ares stated seductively. "Oh…and I love the outfit." Xena's mouth curled into a faked smile as her steely blue eyes met his. Easily, she jumped down from the window – like always – landing on her feet.
"Oh I almost forgot…happy birthday, Ares," she remarked, her tone dripping with sarcasm. Casually, she walked over to a table full of food and ate a grape. "At least the food is good." She glanced around the room at all the gods present. Ares' eyes never left her figure. She continued to stroll over to the gods until she was right in Ares' face. "Just so you know, I really don't appreciate being chased for miles just to end up being some sort of prize piece in your collection of whore priestesses simply for your entertainment. My life is mine."
Very relaxed, she bent down and, using the little dagger, unlocked Gabrielle's cage as well. Gabrielle stood up and took Xena's outstretched hand. "Come on. We're getting out of this place. Good bye, Ares." She turned to leave, but a hand shot out and grabbed her wrist. Xena felt herself being pulled away from Gabrielle and towards Ares until he had captured both of her hands in his and they were standing face-to-face.
"Where did you think you were going? Didn't anyone ever tell you it's rude to leave a party before you even…" He glanced down the woman's body which he held firmly pressed against his. "…open gifts."
"I am NOT your gift, Ares. I belong to no one but myself, and the sooner you realize that, the better off we will both be."
"No. Xena, you need to understand. You belong to me. I made you who you are…and I'll never let you go. You are and always will be mine."
"Not if I can help it." As she said this, she brought her knee up and it swiftly connected with Ares' stomach. Pulling her wrists free, she flipped out of his range and landed beside Gabrielle. "Come on. We have to go. Now!" She took Gabrielle's hand and they headed towards the window which was in the back. It was the only way out. The gods had already barricaded the doorway.
"Gabrielle, hold on to me. Tight!" She clung to the warrior's shoulders as Xena jumped and they both went flying into the air, landing on the windowsill.
"Xena, how can we get down? This window is too high and there's water surrounding the entire perimeter."
"Trust me." Xena gave the window a jerk and it flew open. "See." She pointed to a small rope attached to the window and to a tree on the other side of the water. "Here," she said, handing Gabrielle a small hook.
"What am I supposed to do with this?"
"Hook it onto the rope. Because the rope is slanted, if you hold onto the hook, you will be able to glide to the other side." Gabrielle nodded in understanding. "I want you to go first."
"No. I won't leave you."
"You have to."
"But they'll capture you," Gabrielle pleaded. She glanced down at the gods. They were mobbed around the window and some had already began to climb up.
"No, they won't. I'll go as soon as you're on the other side. I don't want to put both of us on at one time. It might break."
"OK."
"Once you're on the other side, I want you to run. Keep running and don't stop. I'll catch up."
"But…."
"No buts. Just do it."
"Fine, but I'll see you soon, right?"
"Count on it." Gabrielle leaned towards her friend and hugged her. "Now go." Gabrielle got herself situated and was soon gliding down the rope to safety. Sadly, she glanced up at Xena from the other side and then ran.
Faster and faster, she headed towards…where ever the path would take her. She had no idea of the land around her. Gabrielle soon reached the end of the road. It was a cliff. At the bottom were some jagged rocks and the crashing waves of the ocean. There was no way around. She turned to go back , but someone stood in front of her, blocking her way. Velasca. This was not good. Velasca hated her ever since Gabrielle had taken the mask of Amazon queen instead of her.
"My, my. This is somewhat of a jam you've gotten yourself into isn't it?"
"Leave me alone. If you don't, Xena will…."
"Xena will do nothing. She is still preoccupied back at the temple. Now where was I? Oh yes. You know, when you took that mask of queen that was a very foolish think to do. That mask was mine. By Amazon law, that mask was mine! And now you will pay. This is the end." Velasca lifted up her hand. A column of light shot out from it and hit Gabrielle square in the chest. It sent her soaring over the edge. The sound of her echoing call for Xena continued even after she reached the end. Velasca, seeing that the job was done and that revenge had been served, disappeared in a fit of joyful giggles, just before Xena arrived in the clearing. She had heard Gabrielle's cry for help.
"Gabrielle?" Cautiously, she approached the end of the cliff. All became silent when the echoing ceased. Xena slowly looked over and immediately a gasp escaped her lips. She felt like a knife had just been plunged into her heart, but not just killing it, ripping it to shreds.
Gabrielle's body was lying atop of the rocks, covered in blood. Every new tide, washing away the old blood as the new began to show. Gabrielle was dead? This was not what was supposed to happen. The air at this point had become dead quiet. The only sound was Xena's now labored breathing. For a moment Xena just silently sat there as if she still could not grasp what had just happened. Until finally, she lost all control, reality set in, and any and all hope she had died. Unable to control herself, she let out and ear piercing scream. One of pain…sorrow…and the loss of a love. Gabrielle was dead and a part of Xena had died along with her. For Xena, nothing would ever be the same again.
Nature's first green is gold
Her hardest hue to hold
Her early leaf's a flower
But only so an hour
Then leaf subsides to leaf
So Eden sank to grief
So dawn goes down to day
Nothing gold can stay
-R. Frost
"You've got to take me with you. Teach me everything you know. You can't leave me here," Gabrielle implored.
"Why?" responded Xena, collecting her belongings from the shelves of the barn.
"Did you see the guy they want me to marry?!"
"He looks like a gentle soul. That's rare in a man."
"It's not the gentle part I have a problem with. It's the dull, stupid part. Xena, I'm not cut out for this village life. I was born to do so much more."
Visions from the past flooded back into Xena's mind. Visions of Gabrielle. Of their first meeting back in Podedia. With every memory, Gabrielle became more deeply embedded in Xena's mind. 'Gods, no!' Xena thought. 'Gabrielle can't be dead. She couldn't leave me. She wouldn't leave me.'
"Hey, Xena."
"What?"
"I could probably get up there in that saddle behind you," stated Gabrielle, pointing to Argo.
"What are you talking about?"
"Wait, you're not going to just leave me here, are you? I came all this way to see you."
Xena mounted her mare. "That is your problem."
"Hey, I just saved your life."
For a moment Xena thought about Gabrielle's words. She sighed. Reaching her hand down, she pulled Gabrielle up behind her.
'Heading for a life of adventure…and her own death. Gabrielle didn't really know what she was getting herself into.' Xena thought. She could still smell the scents of pine and wildflowers in the air as if this had happened only yesterday. 'Tell me bard, if you could do it all over again, would you still decide to ride with me?'
"You know, where I'm headed they'll be trouble," Xena stated seriously.
"I know," Gabrielle replied, smiling.
"Then why would you want to go into that with me?"
"That's what friends do. They stand by each other when there's trouble."
"All right...friend."
'You were right. Friends stand by each other when there's trouble…. And I am so sorry I wasn't there by you when you needed me. Now my mistake has killed my best friend and ruined my life.'
Xena couldn't help but blame herself. Blame needed to be placed somewhere. 'It's my fault. Maybe if I'd played things a little bit differently, she would still be alive now. I wouldn't care if I did end up as some gift for the god of war, just as long as Gabrielle would be saved.'
Xena's whole body was shaking. Guilt and depression threatened to overwhelm her. Her eyes were mirrored with distress.
She was still sitting by the edge of that cliff, staring at the lifeless body of her beloved friend. She felt so lost. Gabrielle had been her home. And now that she was dead, Xena was alone. She felt hot tears beginning to roll down her cheeks. 'No,' she thought. 'Warriors don't cry.' Wiping away the tears, she struggled to her feet.
Everything seemed to remind Xena of her precious bard. The wind, Gabrielle's comforting touch, drying her tears. The crashing ocean, her voice. Gods how she missed that voice. If she had to pick what she missed most that would be it. Gabrielle's stories and talkative nature brightened even the darkest of days. Now Xena's life seemed like an eternal night. She would give anything to get Gabrielle back. She would have done anything to save her from that awful fate, even if it meant sacrificing her own life.
Tired, she raised her fingers to her mouth and whistled for her horse. Argo immediately came running. Sensing her mistress's distress, Argo approached her and softly nuzzled his head into Xena's arm. Xena gently patted Argo's head. "Good boy," she whispered. As soon as she mounted, they were off. Xena had no idea of where they were headed or of where they would go. They just rode. Rode away from the sorrow, away from the pain, and away from the body of Xena's best friend.
The wind rushed at her face, sending her hair flowing wildly behind her. The two made their way to the sandy shore. The sun was setting, reflecting lights of red and yellow off the warrior's now pale face. But on they rode, never stopping. Each hoof print sending bursts of sand flying up into the air.
Finally, after traveling a good distance along the shore, they stopped. Xena decided to spend the night in a small cave right by the shoreline. It seemed as good a place as any. Actually, it didn't matter to Xena one bit if she slept. She was immortal now. Argo however, needed a break.
She tied her horse to some outstretched rocks on the side of the cave. She also gave Argo some food while they waited for sunrise. Seeing all the little leaves and twigs scattered around within the cave, she gathered them and started a small fire.
The fire blazed forth at its peak. For such a small amount of fuel, it certainly was big. Xena sat there, mesmerized by the flames. She took in deeply what little light and warmth the fire could provide. It was growing increasingly cold now that winter was approaching and Xena of course fully felt its force. She seemed not to be bothered by it though. She was lost in her memories again. Although her face didn't show it, her heart was truly breaking with every beat. Her face looked void of all emotions.
Xena sighed. "I know you're here. You can come out now, Ares." Looking up, she watched the god materialize before her in a flash of blue and gold. "What do you want?"
"Want? Well I want what I have always wanted…you. But that's not why I'm here. I've come to offer my condolences for your loss."
"I don't accept because I know you don't mean it."
"That's not true. I liked the bard. I felt bad when she died."
"Then why didn't you do a thing to stop it?!"
"I couldn't. I didn't see it until she was already over the edge. I'm sorry."
"Yeah. I'm sure."
"No really. When I heard the Gabrielle scream for you, it just…."
"Just stop, Ares. Just stop," she yelled, her voice breaking. Xena found herself on the verge of tears. Standing up, she took a few steps away from the war god and put her back to him. She wouldn't let him see her cry. No one except Gabrielle saw her cry.
"Xena, I'm sorry. Believe me, and I know you're in pain. Let me help you."
"What can you do? Gabrielle is dead."
Ares slowly walked up to her, as if trying to tame a wild animal. Cautiously, her wrapped his arms around her waist. He didn't want her to get defensive. Then for the first time since Gabrielle's death, Xena felt support from another. She leaned into him as he cradled her in his arms, tightening his grip a little. Xena actually felt some of the pain lessen.
"Listen, Xena. I can't bring Gabrielle back. I hope you know that. Only Hera has that power. But I can help with the pain. Xena, my princess, I know of the pain that you feel deep inside. I've seen the effects of death on so many people to know what I'm talking about. You need to let go of your emotions. That is the only way your soul can ever heal."
Xena turned to face him. He actually looked as if he genuinely cared. Xena decided that maybe he was right. Hesitantly she put her arms around him and laid her head on his shoulder. He embraced her, giving her unspoken support, and began to lightly stroke her hair, comforting his warrior. Relieved that she had found a little comfort, she let herself go, and the tears began to fall. Ares knew this. He felt their wetness as each one hit his shoulder.
"It's all right. I'm here for you…always. Everything will be all right now." Xena remained silent, letting herself melt into his powerful body.
Suddenly, he put his hands on her shoulders and moved her head to face him. "Xena, my sweet, I want you to come with me. You need comfort, and I'm the one to give it to you. You can't handle all the pain alone. I will take it away, give you hope, and maybe even love again. I promise, if you will do just one thing for me. Come back to me. Leave all of this behind you and I will give you a new life. I would give you anything. You need only ask."
Xena thought hard about Ares' proposal. Their eyes met. Ares felt as if he was going to loose himself in her blue eyes. Never had he seen anyone with eyes as blue as hers.
"How will you take away what I feel?"
"Well that is the easy part. No magic involved."
"Then how?"
"Like this." He pulled her close as their lips met and Xena felt a serge of adrenaline rush through her body. "Will you come back to me?"
"You mean fight for you."
"That is not what this is about. Xena…I love you. Please." Xena was taken back by his words. He never in his life had said that to her, even when they had been lovers. To her this was proof of his sincerity.
There was a silence that followed. Xena's mind was struggling to get a handle on the situation and decide whether or not to join him.
Finally the silence was broken with a simple, "I will," as a hint of a smile appeared on her lips.
Your sobs arise from deep within
Bury yourself within me and weep
Let go of the pain. I understand
These feelings you yourself can't keep
No shame, this is what I'm here for
So let me stroke your hair and kiss it all away
I know this world is unfair
But I'll be here to stay
We will have eachother as time goes by
We, who are perfectly matched
I will give you this gift
With no strings attached
-A. McConkey
*I changed and left some parts out*
"Great to have you back," Ares stated as he embraced his warrior, again stroking her hair. This time Xena showed no resistance. She let herself fully be taken in by the god of war. "My warrior princess." She put her arms around him as well. In his arms she felt secure and warm. They stayed this way for several minutes. Each falling deeper into the other's embrace.
With a little reluctance they pulled away from each other. "Now what?" Xena asked.
"I'm not sure." Ares appeared to be still a little taken back by her submission to him. Then he smiled. "Give me your hand."
"Why?"
"I'm taking you with me…to my home…and yours." Uncertainty filled the last words of his sentence. He didn't want her to pull away now. He silently awaited for any response from Xena.
"I'd like that," was all she said, smiling. Ares sighed. "What about Argo?"
"Oh we'll bring him…of course. He can stay in the stables of my castle." Xena walked over to her horse, untied the rope, and led the animal over to Ares.
"Are we ready?" Xena inquired.
"If you are."
"I guess." He reached his hand out and took hers, massaging it as he did. He also put a hand on Argo. In a ray of light, all three were gone.
For Xena it was the strangest feeling…to disappear. Her whole body tingled from the sensation. She wondered if Ares felt it too.
They reappeared in a small room. Xena didn't recognize the place. She didn't even know where she was. For all she knew they could be on Mt. Olympus.
"I'll be right back, Xena. I'm going to put Argo in a stable." Xena nodded as he left.
She was alone. Looking around, she noticed the throne. Compared to the temple she had been taken to earlier, it was relatively small. The entire room was lit by candlelight. There didn't appear to be anyone around. No servants, no maids…nothing. Xena was beginning to suspect that she might indeed be on Mt. Olympus.
"OK. Argo has food and is resting in a stable right outside," Ares stated as he appeared in the archway, which led to an adjacent room.
"Good…. Thanks."
He nodded. "Allow me to show you to your room."
"Lead the way. I do have one question though before we continue on. Where are we?"
"Oh I'm sorry. I should have told you. We're in Thrace. This is one of my favorite temples…that's why I brought you here, and I often come here when I want to relax. Any other questions?"
"Nope. But if I think of any, I'll let you know."
"I know you will. Follow me." He gently took her hand, guiding her down a long hallway to a door at its end. "I had this room made especially for you," he stated opening the brass door. "I never doubted that one day you'd come back to me." A small gasp escaped Xena's lips as she over looked the room. It was definitely beautiful. Perhaps the most beautiful room she had ever seen. Though most people would actually expect the opposite from the god of war, the room was actually very bright. No windows, just candles, but the room seemed to give off a feeling of warmth from its elegant tapestries that hung from the wall and from the large luxurious bed which lay in the corner of the room. It appeared to be made of silk and had a fleece overthrow.
"So…do you like it?" Ares asked her almost timidly.
"Like it?" She sighed. "It's beautiful." Xena looked around the room with awe. "Why don't your other temples look like this?"
"Do you honestly think this kind of environment would be a good place for war counseling?"
Xena smiled. "That depends on who you're trying to council."
"Ha ha. Besides…I didn't make my temples. Villagers did. But this room…like you…was my creation. And just like you…it turned out to be beautiful."
She chuckled softly. "Boy was that a pick up line if I've ever heard one. How long have you been working on that one?"
"You don't give me nearly as much credit." He shrugged. "Bout' 15 minutes." They both laughed and turned to face each other. Taking a few steps toward the god, Xena gently reached out to touch his face. Bringing his hand up to hers, he pressed it firmly against his cheek. She felt his warmth as it went through her hand, her own body reacting to the touch. Her adrenaline went up and her hormones began acting in overdrive. Then he gently took her hand and brought it up to his lips, as they made contact in a tender kiss. Feeling a little braver, he placed his hands around her waist, pulling her close, and pressing her body into his. He had been waiting for this for so long, and wanted to be as close to her as he possibly could. Slowly, he brought his head down to hers and their lips met in a kiss. Gently at first, but increasing in passion with each passing moment. Until finally they broke away to stare into each other's eyes.
"I can't tell you how happy I am now that you've come back to me," Ares stated in almost a whisper, letting his eyes roam over her body in undisguised lust.
"You already have. I see it in your eyes."
"It's what you would have always seen…if you had taken the time to look." There was a brief silence until Ares spoke. "What do you say, we get cleaned up a little? It'll help us relax."
Xena smiled. "I'd like that."
He led Xena to another room with a hot tub. The room was filled with the sweet scent of lavender and lilac. "Now I see why this temple is your favorite. It's gorgeous," Xena stated.
"Like I said, that's why I brought you here." Slowly he walked behind her and laid his hands on her shoulders. In a flash, his clothes and Xena's armor disappeared. She was left in her white shift, his hands still on her shoulders. Gently, he let then slide off her shoulders, pulling down her straps as he did so. Xena felt herself shiver under his touch as the last piece of clothing fell to the ground. She turned to face him.
Looking into each other, they became transfixed until Ares gestured to the tub. They stepped in and sat on different sides so they would be able to just look at each other. The water was warm and even was lightly layered with rose petals drifting over top.
"Ares, I want to take this time to thank you."
"Really? For what?"
"For what you've done and are doing for me." She smiled. "I mean if you hadn't came to me then I would still be in that cave. My memories were just too much. I thought I could run away from them." Her smile turned into a frown as she stared into the water. She could see Gabrielle's face in the water. "I was wrong. It is impossible to run from them…."
"Impossible to run. Xena, you need to confront them. That is the reason I came to you. To help you do it. Keeping all those memories and all the pain to yourself like you were doing would eventually destroy you. I know…I've seen it happen." He glanced at her and then refocused his gaze back on the water. "I couldn't let that happen. Not to you."
"Why," Xena asked, looking at him. "Not that I'm not grateful, but why do you care so much?"
"Because…seeing you be destroyed slowly by your misplaced guilt would destroy me…. I felt your pain when she died. I know you really cared about her. She was a good friend. I felt your desperation as you rode along that beach. And I felt your guilt as you sat alone in that cave. I would do anything to ease you of that pain…and I will. I promise you that."
"I'm sorry, Ares, but there is no possible way you could have known what I was feeling at that moment. It is impossible to imagine."
"But I didn't just imagine it."
"Then how did you feel it?! You've never lost anyone." Xena's voice grew angry. "Think about it. Put yourself in my position. Imagine that you had a friend. This person was your life. Your reason for living and your courage to keep going. And all your life revolved around this person. Now kill that person. What are you left with?"
"I did lose someone I cared about," he whispered as if he didn't want her to hear. Everything became still and quiet, and Xena felt her anger quickly diminishing.
"What?" She sounded shocked.
"I did…I lost someone I truly cared about. Someone I loved…loved with all my heart…. She was my life and my reason. I used to get up in the morning…just to see her. Although my pain was different than yours…perhaps even greater. You see, she didn't die. She left me. Now every time I see her, I feel what we had…and the pain returns. Your pain will decrease as your life goes on, but for me, she serves as a constant reminder. I can never forget." Xena looked at the god, eyes full of sympathy. He took a deep breath. "Xena, you have no idea what kind of pain I felt…. You literally killed me when you left." The warrior's head jerked up. She was the one he was taking about? Xena had no idea he had ever actually loved her.
"I didn't know you cared that much."
"That's because what I feel…there aren't words strong enough to express. You do need to understand though, before you I never experienced what it felt like to love someone. And if you hadn't come along, I might've gone centuries or never felt it. But you came along, and when I finally was able to come to an understanding with what I was feeling…and realize it was love…you left."
Xena's eyes shown with a slight glimmer or tears as she looked at him. "I'm sorry I hurt you."
"That's in the past, Xena. I just want you here. With me now."
"Well it's not like I'm going anywhere," Xena stated, smiling causing Ares to smile too. "Besides, I kinda like it here."
"I thought you would…. You have expensive taste."
"Ha! You should talk." They both laughed as the room somehow became lighter through happiness.
Ares stood up and walked around to Xena's back. Gently, he placed his hands on her shoulders, brushing away her long hair. Xena exhaled deeply as he began to massage her sore muscles. He seemed to know exactly where she hurt, because his fingers were targeted there immediately. Xena felt herself relaxing under the circular motion of his fingers. Once he felt her shoulders loosen he stopped and they finished their baths.
Ares stepped out first. He extended his arm out to Xena. She took it and he guided her out of the tub. Once out, he handed her a towel and she began to dry herself. Ares watched the process with interest. To him (not to mention others) she was quite magnificent. She finished, handing the towel back to the god.
He took her hand and led her back to her room. The castle was empty, so neither concerned themselves with modesty (not that either was). He shut the door and tuned back to the woman before him. He then gently took her hands in his.
"Xena, I need you to understand something. I know why you left me, but it wasn't what you thought. You thought I didn't care about you, but that is about as far from the truth as you can get. You're my princess. I have never not cared about you. I pulled away because…."
"Because?"
"Because I was afraid."
"Afraid, why?"
"I didn't want to become too attached to anyone. I was afraid you'd leave me and I'd be crushed. Well obviously I was wrong. You left me because of my fear…causing it to become a reality. I just want to apologize for hurting you. That was never my intent. I love you."
"I want to apologize for something as well."
"What?"
"After I left you, I closed myself off from any kind of relationship. I didn't want to ever feel that kind of pain again. But all these years you've been trying to get me back, trying to get me to fight for you…you were right. If I had just listened to you then Gabrielle would still be alive today."
"No, that's the guilt talking. It is not your fault she died."
"Yes it is! If not mine then who's fault is it? Blame has to be placed somewhere."
"No! Things had to play out the way that they did. Maybe that was just meant to be, and you can't change destiny. That was probably her fate."
"No, it wasn't!"
"You don't know that! Besides…she's happier now. She's in the Elysian Fields. I know it. Xena, Gabrielle wouldn't want you to blame yourself. You know that. So please…be a little easier on yourself." With his finger he tilted her head up so he could look into her eyes. Her blue eyes glistened from the obvious wetness of tears that now were flowing freely. Slowly he lowered his head to hers and their lips met in a tender, comforting kiss.
Suddenly Xena pushed away. "Ares, before we go any further, I need to tell you something now before another word is spoken."
"What?"
"I love you."
Passions released, they let themselves melt into the other person. Ares gently pushed Xena onto the bed, covering her body with his own. Their kisses started out light and gentle, but grew more passionate and aggressive. Yes, this it what they both wanted. In this one night they were able to come to terms with a love they almost lost, but rekindled before it was too late.
Falling deeper into each other's ecstasy, they let go of their emotions, emotions which had been stored away for far too long. Nothing was held back. And for the first time in ten years the warrior princess opened her legs for the god of war.
You can guess what happened next.
Fire is extinguished
Light has gone out
No one to turn to
Life full of doubt
Death of a friend
Has taken its toll
Diminishing the fire
Destroying the goal
Needing some comfort
People don't care
Scared and alone
A life unfair
A thin ray of light
A possible rescue
A building trust
A life anew
The night, a blessing
Two souls unite
Two become one
Rekindling the light
A hero you are
Showing me love
Our new life begun
A gift from above
-Me (Katrina)
Xena lay there, content, on the luxuriously soft bed. A protective arm lay loosely draped over her chest. Ares. Her mind drifted into thoughts of last night…last night. It had been perfect. Xena had given herself fully to the god of war as they made love. She had fallen asleep late that night, still wrapped in his powerful arms. Her trend of thought was broken as she felt his body begin to stir next to hers. She glanced over at the god. Catching her gaze, he smiled broadly. "Morning," Xena stated, lost in his eyes. His eyes were those that she could totally loose herself in, and she often did. It was as if they contained some kind of attractive force that would capture her heart and never let go.
"Morning." Slowly, as if he were still unsure of his actions, he moved his head to hers and they met in a gentle kiss. "I'm almost scared to ask you this, but how did you sleep?"
Xena smiled, knowing what he meant. "I enjoyed last night, Ares. Thank you." Still, the thought of the god of war afraid of something was amusing to her, and unconsciously, a small laugh escaped her lips.
"What?" His expression grew puzzled.
"Nothing…. Are you about ready to get up?"
"No, not just yet. I want to stay in this moment just a little bit longer. I wish I could be here with you forever." Xena smiled at his sweetness. "Xena, I've never loved anyone the way I love you."
"I'm guessing that's a good thing."
Ares laughed. "I should hope so."
"I'm just curious, Ares. Why did you want me as your birthday gift?"
"Well I…."
"Honestly," Xena stated, cutting him off.
"Honestly, well…I wanted you badly enough that if you wouldn't come back to me willingly, I made up my mind to take you back be force." Xena stared at Ares for a moment, studying him, and then turned to leave. Immediately, his hand shot out and took hold of hers. She turned back to him. "Xena, you need to understand. I loved you and you just kept pushing me away. I just kept hiding all of the pain I was in, but behind my mask of arrogance I was dying in my grief."
"I didn't think you really cared. I'm sorry."
"Don't be. You're here now." Xena smiled as he sat to face her. He bent his head down and pressed his lips onto hers. As she draped her arms over his shoulders, he pulled her close to him. Xena leaned into him, feeling her bare skin next to his.
Their kiss was suddenly broken by the sound of a door slamming open, as morning's light filled the room. A soldier stood in the doorway, shocked. "Oh god! I am so sorry! Lord Ares, please don't kill me." He turned his head and covered his eyes with his hand. Ares sighed, looked at Xena, and kissed her lightly on the lips.
"I'm sorry. Business calls." He slowly got off the bed and his clothes appeared on him. Xena pulled the cover up around her to cover her own naked body.
"All right lieutenant," Ares stated from behind him. Cautiously, he turned his head to face the god, fully expecting to be killed right then and there. But Ares did not. He just stood there with his arms crossed, waiting. "Well?"
"Please forgive me for the intrusion. It will never happen again. I swear."
"All right. All right. Now what was it you wanted to tell me?"
"Well actually its for the both of you," he stated, glancing meaningfully at Xena. Ares caught his gaze and scowled. No one was allowed to touch his prize, or even think about it for that matter. The lieutenant refocused he eyes back on Ares. "The scout from the north has just sent word that the legion has arrived." Ares smiled.
"What legion?" Xena asked from the background. Both turned to look at her.
"Your army," Ares stated. "We'll start off slow. Tomorrow we'll take a small town south of here. Then once you're adjusted, we'll take Athens, Rome, Gaul, until the entire known world is under your command." He waited for Xena's reply.
She thought for a moment and then smiled. "Well it looks like I'll be a busy girl."
* * * * *
Clicking the hook on the horse's reigns to make sure it was tight, the warrior mounted. All around her were a soldiers preparing for battle. Her soldiers. They had been hand picked and created by Ares. All ready and willing to die if she should command it. Not that Xena would ever do such a thing, but it was nice feeling not to any revolt.
Revolt. Her mind skipped back to that night about five summers ago. Led by her lieutenant, Darphus, her army had turned against her and she was forced to run a gauntlet. Xena remembered all the fear and rage she had felt as she had walked down the path with her own army brutally beating her. She had barely escaped with her life that night. She did however get her revenge. Xena smiled and pushed all ideas of a rebellion out of her mind. That would not happen this time.
She was brought back to reality as she felt a hand rest atop her shoulder. Ares. He had appeared right behind her in the saddle. "So how is my princess doing? Ready?" She leaned into him as she felt him slide his hands around her waist, pulling her closer. Even through her leather warrior outfit, she could still feel him and it stimulated her.
"Me? I'm doing fine. As for ready…I don't know. I mean look at this army. All brauns no brains?"
Ares knew she was joking and smiled. "Yeah that's right. All brauns no brains, Xena. Besides, why do they need brains? They've got you. You're the heart of the army…not to mention me." Xena laughed a little. "Make me proud…my warrior princess." Gently, he rolled his fingers along her upper arm.
"You know I will."
"Yes…I do." As the god pulled away and dismounted, Xena founded herself wanting to go back to him. She didn't want to leave. She wanted his touch, wanted to feel his body against hers, wanted last night, but she knew she would forget it in battle. He turned to look up at her. "You'd better get going." He was trying to sound optimistic, but Xena knew he too wished she could stay.
"Yeah. Be back in a little bit." Spurring her horse, she rode up to the front of her army, and they were off, riding into the sunset.
She kept her eyes focused in front of her until a small village came into view. For a moment, she paused, thinking. This village was not guarded, didn't have any source of protection against an attack, and had no real profit to be taken. But this is what Ares wanted, so…she wanted it as well. Feeling a surge of adrenaline rush through her body, she screamed her battle cry and her army descended towards the village.
Person after person, time after time, she plunged her sword into the villagers. Some even surrendered right away, but no one was spared except women and children. This was Xena's moral code in battle. She hardened her heart…again, feeling no guilt as her victims screamed out in pain. She became blind to all of the tears that she was causing. Her hands, covered in blood, had a mind of their own. Everything she did was based on reaction…on instinct.
Within a half hour the town was completely destroyed. Bodies littered the streets of the now leveled town. There wasn't a single house that hadn't been turned into rubble. As for the women and children that had survived, their spirits and souls were destroyed. Fear and pain were prominent on everyone's face. To Xena however, this was considered a good thing. It meant she had done her job right. Another victory.
A smile appeared on Xena's lips as she left that village. She felt exhilarated. Her heart pounded wildly, echoing in her head. She had truly missed this. The freedom of it. She glanced around the remnants of the village and kicked her horse to a gallop, her army following. She then headed back to the temple, victorious and confident. Ares would be pleased.
* * * * *
"Will you just trust me?! I can handle this on my own, Hercules." The smaller warrior glared confidently at the other.
"But what if you need my help?"
"I won't. Besides, you deserve a break. Here's how I see it. You stay in this village for let's say…a week. Enjoy yourself, relax, while I go find the boy. Then we'll meet up again here in a few days. You need some rest…. Now I gotta go"
"Iolaus, wait!"
"Nope. Duty calls. Good bye, Hercules." With that he marched out of the tavern, closing the door behind him.
Hercules looked around him. Even with all the people around him, he still felt alone and sighed. "Well," he stated quietly to himself, "this is going to be a long week." He raised his hand to signal the bartender, who brought him a mug of ale. No sooner had he brought the cup to his lips, when he heard screaming coming from outside. "What in Tartarus is that?!" Then, dropping the cup, he ran outside. His eyes glared in both surprise and hatred at the army before him, killing innocent people.
Hercules ran up to a soldier about to kill an older man. Kicking the soldier's sword from his hand, Hercules threw the man to the ground. He glared down at the warrior as a look of disgust crossed his face. "Who is your leader?"
"I'd rather die," the soldier sneered.
"That can be arranged. Now who is it?!"
"I told you, I'd rather die before I betray her."
"Her?" Suddenly, his head jerked up, hearing that one warrior yell that he had known so well. "Xena?" His face went blank as he saw her riding by, thrusting her sword into a villager. She seemed to notice him and smiled.
"Wrong town, Hercules!"
"Xena, what are you doing?!"
"Fulfilling my destiny!" Flashing another brilliant smile, she rode off. Hercules was in shock. Xena…leading an army? He had to talk to her. Unfortunately, it was already too late. The town was left in ruins and the army was already heading for the hills. Death and pain was everywhere. And to think…just minutes ago this town was at peace. Hercules knew he must find her…and find out what had happened.
* * * * *
"So Xena…something wrong?" Xena sat quietly on a chair in her room, thinking, the god of war right behind her with his hands on her shoulders, gently massaging them.
"No. Why would anything be wrong?" Ares knew Xena too well to believe that though. Her tone would have been enough to fool others, but not him.
"Just because you've barely said one word to me this entire evening."
"I'm just thinking."
"Would you mind thinking out loud then?"
Xena turned around to look Ares in the eye. "I'm just thinking about someone I met in that village today."
"Really? Who?"
"Hercules."
Ares became suddenly quiet and stopped massaging. He remembered how his half brother had stolen his warrior princess away from him the last time. He would not let that happen again.
"Kill him."
Xena looked at the god, shocked. "Why?"
"He stands between you and world domination. He must be destroyed."
"I can't do that, Ares."
"Why not?!"
"…Because I still care about him."
* * * * *
Hercules was dumbfounded. He couldn't figure out why Xena would ever revert back to her old ways. He had tried asking different people, but all they could tell him was how the unbeatable warrior princess would soon rule the world. Truth was, this was actually a very real possibility…and Hercules knew it. That was why he knew he must find out what had happened causing the change in Xena.
He decided to find out from the primary source: Xena herself and he made up his mind to go to every one of Ares' temples until he found and was able to confront the warrior princess.
Meanwhile, back at the temple, Ares sat stubbornly on his throne. He had stormed out of the room when Xena had told him that she still cared about Hercules. He was furious with her. Indeed he cared about her, but he did not want to loose her, and wouldn't…no matter what the cost.
That night he didn't go to Xena. He left her alone to think about what she'd be missing if she ever left. The result of this action was actually quite the opposite. Xena relished in the quiet. It was time to just relax and calm her soul.
Gabrielle. Xena pushed that word as far away from the surface as it would go. Her best friend, she kept hidden deep within her heart. But now…in the quiet, her depths began to surface.
This was what she really needed. Then the tears began to fall, slow and steady. "Oh Gabrielle," Xena whispered softly. It was in that moment that she decided she would - no she had to go to her.
Silently, she crept outside and found Argo. She had left without her armor, and was just in her nightgown, but didn't care. This couldn't wait. Xena needed to confront these feelings…and the best place to do that was…by that cliff. She rode into the night, through the darkness, to find her light: Gabrielle. Reaching her destination, she dismounted Argo and paced to the ridge. Then she began to cry.
Morning came. Xena had returned in time for the now ritual morning conquering of a village. She was sure Ares had noticed her absence, but he didn't say anything. They hadn't really been talking much ever since Xena's last confession.
With the wave of her arm, Xena led the army into the sunrise, leaving Ares along with all of her other problems behind her. On the battlefield there were only two elements: friends and foes, and the only thing on Xena's mind was winning.
Ares sat on his throne with his head in his hands. Xena had broken him, and he was trying to think of a way to apologize. After all, she had a right to her own opinion, and besides, he missed her.
All of a sudden the door flew open, causing Ares to jump up. Hercules stood defiantly in the doorway. "Where's Xena?" Hercules practically yelled, his temper rising.
Ares smirked and casually strolled over to his brother. "Well let's see…. That's for me to know and you to find out. Still…oh well, I might as well tell you. I'm proud of it. She's off in another town…destroying it." He knew that would irritate his brother.
"Thanks for your help," Hercules stated sarcastically. "Now how bout telling me which one."
"Why in the world would I tell you? You'd just go there, stop her, and then kill her."
"No, I wouldn't. Yes, I'd stop Xena, but I would not kill her. I know she still has goodness in her. Ares, I don't know how you managed to resurface her evil side, but I'm here to make sure it's put back where it belongs."
"I am warning you, Hercules. Stay out of this. If you do anything to harm her, I swear, I'll kill you, brother or not."
"I give you my word that I won't hurt her."
"Like your word means anything to me."
"Would you at least tell me what happened."
"Oh." Ares shrugged his shoulders casually. "Gabrielle died."
"What?!"
"You heard me. She's dead, gone, finito, no more, vanished, away as in see you in a few decades. As for Xena, she took Gabrielle's death pretty hard. I'm surprised she didn't even try to commit suicide, at the rate she was going. I just went to her when she needed me." Hercules was shocked at Gabrielle's death. He hadn't even heard of it before now.
"Xena doesn't need you, Ares. She can take care of herself."
"She needs support. You weren't there to see the pain she was in when she lost her best friend. I was!"
"This is not about you helping her! This is about you tricking her to fight for you!"
"What trick?! Xena loves me…and I love her. And if you dare try to split us up, I'll…"
"You'll what?" Hercules interrupted. "Kill me? I'm immortal. You can't. Besides, Zeus would never allow it."
"You come between me and Xena and I will kill you. That's a promise. It's time you know the obvious fact: Xena is mine."
"Why don't we let her decide that?"
"Why? I already know her answer. Now get out of my temple!"
Hercules stormed out of Ares temple. He would not let it go at that. He had to find Xena.
That afternoon when Xena and her army returned, Ares decided that he needed to get Xena to become Hercules' definite enemy.
They sat across from each other in Xena's bedroom with the doors locked. "Xena, we need to talk."
"Oh really? I didn't know we were talking to each other." She folded her hands across her chest and gave a spiteful stare at the god of war.
"I'm sorry. I blew my cool the other day. It just struck me pretty hard when you said that you cared about him."
"You asked me how I felt…and I told you."
Ares nodded in understanding. "Do you love him?" His voice, suddenly serious. She didn't say anything. "Do you?!"
"No, I don't love him. I care about him...like a very close friend."
Ares sighed in relief. "Xena, I love you. You know that, and I'm telling you this for your own good." He walked up to Xena and gently took her hands in his. "Do not trust Hercules. He is trying to take you away from me." He reached his hand up and gently tucked a lock of Xena's dark black hair behind her ear. "I don't want to loose you."
"You won't. You have to trust me."
"You know I do. I'm just concerned. You did leave once before because of him. I just want to be sure it won't happen again."
"Trust me!" Xena paused for a moment and then smiled. "I've learned from my mistakes."
* * * * *
Another day, another village. At dawn Xena was out rounding up her troops and within minutes, they were ready to go. The next village in line was no different than the first five except for one thing: defense. It was the first village to actually try it. Looking down at the small town, Xena could plainly see that she was blocked. Hercules as well as a legion of Amazons were situated in between her army and their destination.
"Xena." Xena turned to her lieutenant, who had rode up to her side. "What are we going to do?"
"Do? What do you mean do? We'll do what we've always done. These Amazons don't matter. They can't change the outcome. Victory is ours. It only makes things more interesting."
Xena waved her arm and the two armies collided. The Amazons were more numerous than Xena's army, but they had less skills. As it worked out, Xena and Hercules were left to fight each other. No one else could match either of their skills.
"So you couldn't handle this by yourself?" Xena taunted.
"There is no shame in asking for help."
"There is in my standards."
"Xena, why are you doing this?" Hercules questioned in between parrying Xena's blows.
"Ares wants it done. That's why."
"How could you go back to him?! I thought those days were behind you."
"I don't think I ever really left. He was always inside me…just buried."
"So you love him?"
"Yes…I do."
They continued the rest of their sword play in silence. Theirs was a skillful dance of parries and blows that very few would be able to follow. Xena was winning, as was her army. Xena glanced over to see approximately a quarter of the Amazons dead, lying in the field, and her army already in the village.
It was her temporary lack of focus that gave Hercules the opening her needed. In one motion he knocked the sword from Xena's hand and encircled her with his arms, trapping her. Because of his size and strength Xena's attempts at escape proved futile.
Suddenly she felt the pain of something sharp hitting her neck. Reflexively bringing her hand up to the irritation, Hercules released her from his hold. Taking hold of the object, she felt a sting as she pulled in out. A dart…a poison dart. Xena jerked her head from side to side, chakram in hand, looking for the person who threw the dart that hit her.
Unfortunately her vision was already beginning to get blurry. The dart had been perfectly aimed and it was taking it's toll. Before long there was a total black out in Xena's mind as she hit the ground, unconscious.
"Did it work?" Ephiny, queen of the Amazons, yelled as she came running up to Hercules, crossbow in hand.
"Yes I think it did. Good aim." Gently, he picked up the fallen warrior. Then, cradling Xena in his arms, disappeared into the woods.
Alone, I sit in my seclusion
Drifting deeper into mists of delusion
Thoughts wander in with the tide
Memories of lost friends and wounded pride
As I sit, fragments of lost dreams
Mix together with life's color streams
Remnants of things that come to past
Make the illusion seem so vast
And I sit and think a while
Abandoned hopes start to pile
Wondering when my life is grand
Plots forming to make me stand
How long will I sit in my chair
Blaming others for a life unfair
Planning for this time to cease
Ready and waiting for some peace
-T. Coley
*I made some changes*
Slowly Xena regained consciousness and opened her eyes. Reflexively her arms jerked to touch her pierced neck, but could not. Looking around, she discovered that her wrists and ankles had been bound. She tried with all her might to break them, but could not because they appeared to be leather.
Xena decided that she must be somewhere inside the Amazon village due to the fact that she could hear one of their unmistakable burial ceremonies being held outside.
"Xena."
The warrior abruptly turned her head towards the source of its voice. "Hercules. Is there a point to this conversation other then that you need to inform me of the fact that you plan to kill me?"
"Yes, there is a point, and no, I'm not planning on killing you." He paused, eyes studying her. "I just want to know why."
Xena sighed. "Why not? We all gotta die sometime, right? The way I figure it, you have to live life the way you want it, bending the world to your will and making a lasting impression. And besides, I what have I got to loose?"
"Your heart."
"Ha. I already lost that.... Nothing is left," she stated, her voice breaking.
"Listen Xena, I know about Gabrielle's death, and I'm sorry, but this is not the way to live your life. She's dead...you're not."
"Hercules, I would do anything to be dead now. Only in death do your find true paradise...and love. A love that can never be destroyed...not by war...not by hate...not even by death. You see, I envy Gabrielle."
"If you want death so much, why don't you just give into it?"
"Don't you see? I can't! I'm immortal." She paused and then continued sarcastically. "A gift from Zeus."
"When?"
"While Gabrielle and I were hiding in his temple."
"You shouldn't disgrace his gift to you like that."
"What gift?! It's more of a burden...along with his other gift."
"What other gift?"
"The power to heal. But what good are any of these so called 'gifts' if I couldn't even save the one person I cared the most about?"
Slowly Hercules shook his head and sighed. "Xena listen to me ... you can't let that evil ... that darkness that once controlled you to rule you again. You can't! I won't let you."
"You have no way to stop me."
"I just did.... You know this is wrong. Deep down you know this is wrong."
"I know ... but I just don't care."
"Then you'll have to stay here."
Xena turned her head away from the demigod. She remained silent. Not saying a word, she shut her eyes as if to she could block out everything: her world and all the people in it. She could still sense Hercules's presence until she finally heard him stand and walk towards the door. Slowly the door creaked open. Then listened as the receding footsteps slowly faded into the distance.
Meanwhile back in a camp in the woods the remains of Xena's army had gathered together around a small campfire. The night would be soon upon them but no one was ready to go to sleep. Everyone was afraid. Some had their own reasons but the one that had everyone felling sick to the stomach was the warrior princess. They had lost her to the enemy then fled as soon as they could. They knew they couldn't go back to the temple. They left Ares' fiancée back in battle. He would kill them all. The soldiers knew they needed to get her back, but also knew they could never fight the whole amazon legion by themselves. No one really asked the question of what to do, but it was mumbled the entire night. Not one soldier fell asleep.
* * * * *
"Xena."
Xena sighed deeply, opened her eyes, and then turned to the voice that had awakened her from a deep sleep.
"Ephiny."
"I just wanted to know why."
Xena shifted her gaze to the ceiling. "I've already explained my whole life story to Hercules and I really don't wanna have to do it again. Just go ask him."
"I know Gabrielle is dead and I sympathize. Do you think I wasn't saddened when I was first informed? I knew her too and she was a close friend. But I dealt with my pain. Now what I want to know is why Ares? Couldn't you have turned to someone who can actually help you with your grief, someone who cares for you. Ares doesn't care about you. He doesn't care about anyone ... except himself. Maybe he wants you, but certainly never cared about you. That isn't the answer."
"Oh? Then what is?"
"You need to ... you have to ... you just need to deal with it."
"This is how I deal with it."
"With Ares?"
"Exactly.... I love him."
"No, I don't buy it. Not the Xena who once helped me with defeating the centaurs. Not the Xena who once risked her life to save those of the entire amazon nation from a psycho goddess.... Not the Xena who came here years ago, learning to become a warrior, and vowing never to trust a god ever again." Her voice slowly began to fade. "No...it can't be that Xena."
"You know you're right.... It's not that Xena. That Xena had something to live for. She had hope. Me, well all I've got is emptiness and grief."
"Xena, I know you still have goodness in you. Please don't give in. This is not what Gabrielle would want."
Xena watched her leave. And could hear her and Hercules talking outside.
"Any luck?"
"No.... You know, she is the most stubborn and willful person I have ever met."
"I know how you feel. What did she say?"
"Well, she is convinced she is in love with Ares, and refuses to listen to reason."
"I know she still has that loving person I once knew inside her. She just needs a little help bringing it out."
"Right now she's not accepting help from anyone."
"Tough. She's just going to have to deal with me."
Then the voices faded and the silence came once again. Xena blinked several times in an attempt to clear her vision which had become blurred. "Finally," she mumbled to herself, and then smiled. Xena glanced up at her right wrist and revealed a small knife hidden in her hand. Ephiny came close enough for Xena to grab the dagger with had loosely been hung from her belt. Easily she wedged the dagger in between her skin and the leather. The tie broke and her wrist was free. Moments later she sat up, stretching her sore muscles. Standing up, she walked toward the door and shoved the dagger into the lock. It snapped and she was free. It wasn't long before she had found her horse and was outside. She rode straight through the center of the village. No one could catch her. She left that village behind.
* * * * *
"I'm glad you got out," Ares stated, looking over at the warrior.
"You never had any doubt. After all…you didn't even try and help me." Her anger was obviously rising as Ares tempted her already naturally low patience level. She didn't even look at him.
"I didn't know."
"Tell it to someone who cares."
"I honestly never knew about it. Your army never told me."
"They're afraid of you."
"Now they have reason to be."
Xena turned to look at him. "What do you mean?"
"They left you. That counts as a betrayal in my book. A good army never leaves a fallen commander. They must be taught a lesson."
She stood up and walked over to him. "You mean killed."
"Call it what you will."
"Ares, no. They must learn loyalty through trust and they'll never be able to trust if they're fearing for their lives. Let me handle this in my own way."
"I don't want this incident ever to happen again. And sometimes you don't make a strong enough point."
"I'll handle it."
Ares shrugged. "As you wish."
With that Xena nodded and stood up to leave, but a hand held her back. She turned around and was face to face with him. Gently their lips met and were one in a kiss.
Holding her by the arms he slowly broke the contact and looked into her eyes. "But we still must punish the Amazons. I didn't forget about that," Ares stated smugly.
"They couldn't have done anything to hurt me anyway."
"What?"
"I guess I should probably tell you." She sighed. "Well…do you remember when you had all those gods chasing me and Gabrielle?" He nodded. "Well we had to find somewhere to rest, so we decided to seek shelter in Zeus's temple if he would let us."
"I know about that. Go on."
"Well, Zeus was more than hospitable. We had all the food we wanted and new clothes. And as I was ready to leave he gave me two gifts, saying it would help me. But if I would have known how it'd turn out I would have never accepted. I could be with Gabrielle now, had I not accepted." She paused, feeling the warmth of tears starting to form in her eyes. "Well anyway he gave me immortality and the power to heal."
Ares had the look of shock on his face. "Power to heal as in the hind's power to heal?"
"Something like that."
"And why didn't you tell me before?"
"I didn't think of it. Besides I thought you knew me well enough to know that if Gabrielle died I'd want to go with her. I would have killed myself if I could."
"Well at least you told me."
"I was just waiting until the right time…. That's why I do not wish to punish the Amazons. They did nothing except try to help me."
Ares sighed and began stroking her hair. "I swear if you'd ever become a god it would be goddess of mercy." He laughed silently to himself. "Then again you already are a goddess…my goddess. I love you, Xena."
She smiled. "And I you…. Ares, there is something I need to do."
"I understand."
She gently touched her fingers to her lips and then to his. "Till I return." She turned headed outside, mounting her horse.
* * * * *
Without saying a word, she approached the cliff she'd seen so many times in her nightmares. Sweat began to pour from her forehead and tears formed in her eyes as she approached its edge. Sadness enclosed around her, but she had to do this. She had to face these feelings. "Oh Gabrielle." A wave of nausea hit her as she collapsed to the ground, head in heads, crying.
Suddenly there was the sound of a snap from behind her. A twig perhaps, but she knew someone was there. She turned her head in the direction of the noise. Sure enough there was a man in the woods staring right back at her. Hercules. She turned back toward the cliff and focused her gaze on the ground. She was not in the mood to talk to anyone. Xena remained silent hoping that he would just go away if she stayed quiet, but instead, he came towards her.
"Xena…I probably can't understand what you're feeling at this very moment, but I can try if you'll just let me help."
"Hercules, the only way you can help is by leaving me alone. I can handle it on my own…in my own way."
"Is this what you call handling it?"
"Partly."
"What's the other part? Killing innocent people?"
"Hercules, no one is innocent. No one."
"Not even Gabrielle?"
"No, she wasn't, but she was as close as you could get."
"Are you telling me that if Gabrielle was in a village and you didn't know her, you'd just kill her?"
"I never said that."
"Gabrielle is no different than any of those other people you kill every day."
"She is different!" Xena yelled, shaking her head.
"Why? Because she knew you?!"
"No."
"Xena, listen to yourself. Look at what you're doing!"
"I know exactly what I'm doing."
"I thought you would say that. That's why I brought someone with me. Someone who honestly cares about you and loves you…not like Ares."
He pointed towards the trees and Xena's eyes followed his finger. Out from the woods emerged an old woman. A look of shock took over Xena's expression. "Mother," she said in almost a whisper. It was then that the feeling of guilt found its place in Xena's heart.
* * * * *
"Xena, how could you?" Cyrene held her daughter close on the ground. Xena didn't answer. She couldn't face her mother. Not after the things she did. Gently Cyrene lifted her daughter's head to look into her eyes. The once steely blue eyes displayed nothing but sorrow.
Cyrene smiled. "That's what I thought…. You don't know why you did it. It's just how you vented your anger. Am I right?" Xena nodded, but turned away from her mother's eyes. "You know it's wrong." Xena shut her eyes as she felt the tears return. She shook her head and tried to get up. Cyrene caught her arm and gently pulled her back. "Xena, I know the pain you must be in. Believe me I do. I felt the sane thing when your brother died. But even though you hurt, that is no excuse to make others hurt. You must do what's right."
"What is right? Before with Gabrielle that felt right. But then she died. Now that I'm with Ares that also feels right…. What is right?"
"Look inside your heart, Xena. That is where you will find your answer. No matter what you did I will always be here for you. I will always love you." She stood up and embraced her daughter. Both were crying. She sighed. "My little one. You were always so strong. I know you will get through this. I know."
Slowly Xena stepped away. She let her head hang down a bit. "I have to go."
Cyrene nodded. "So be it. But please think about what I said."
"I will." Xena mounted her horse and rode into the forest.
"Did she listen?" asked Hercules coming out from the trees.
"She heard me yes, but I don't know if she really listened. That's up to her."
* * * * *
Slowly Xena made her way back to the temple. She was in no hurry. She needed the quiet time. She needed to think about her life and its direction. That talk with her mother had stirred within her a kind of emotional battle. She felt her soul being torn in two. 'Follow my heart?' she thought. 'In fighting for good I lost the one person I cared most about. That can't be right. What am I supposed to do?' She kept on riding. She never looked back though, always kept her eyes facing forward. Slowly she began straying from the path. She didn't know where she was going, only that she must go. Never resting, never tiring, she never stopped. She rode for what seemed like an hour, but was in fact three days. It was then she decided to return. She still didn't have the answers to all her questions…and wasn't even sure what the questions were. She was tired though and needed rest.
By the time she reached Ares' temple it was well into the night. It was pouring outside and Xena was completely soaked by the time she reached the temple. The rain had chilled her and she was now shivering. She pulled open the big metal doors leading to the great hall. She could see the light that shone from Ares' corridor as it lit up the end of the poorly lighted hallway. Xena sighed. This would be a welcome sight after the last few days. Still she felt something was not right here. There was something wrong. She sensed it. Slowly she strolled down the hallway to the door and pushed it open.
In that moment Xena's heart seemed to stop as she saw the sight in front of her eyes. Ares was making love to another woman. And not just any woman. This was one of his servants...Cleo. A servant that had always been there for Xena and someone Xena had called 'friend'.
Ares looked up from the bed and a look of distress crossed over his face. "Oh my god. Xena, this is not what it looks like!" He immediately jumped out of the bed and his clothes reappeared on him. Slowly he walked toward the warrior. As if seeking to tame a wild animal. He timidly reached out to touch her, but she pulled away sharply.
Xena felt the tears which she had pushed back only minutes before returning. She wanted to tell him what she felt like inside. Wanted to tell him that with this little act, he had not just broken her heart, but shattered it. And tell him that even though she was trying to control the feelings of hate and pain, they threatened to overwhelm her, but all that came out was a simple, "How could you?" And with that she ran from the temple…into the storm.
I lay on my back
Staring at an oncoming storm
Shuddering, I cling desperately
To the fine line between
Enlightenment and limitation
Good and evil
Right and wrong
My conscience is overwhelmed
Insignificant against the thunder
Inner balance dances with destruction
Lightning screams across the sky
Inexplicable thoughts glow
Amidst a view of confusion
Logic is dangerous, instinct criminal
Inner solution contradicts itself
Consolation is futile
And yet I sit, amidst the chaos
Juggling temptation and morality
Looking inward at my soul, torn
And waiting for a break in the storm
-J. Warner
*I changed and left some parts out*
Having ridden into a forest, Xena dismounted her horse and grasped a tree for support. She concentrated on breathing…just breathing as she leaned with all her weight into the hard bark. She now had no one…absolutely no one left to turn to. She grasped the tree tightly while her body was shaking from sobs. Xena glanced at her horse, her faithful Argo, who was standing by his mistress's side. "Why me, Argo?" Xena asked her horse. "What did I do to deserve all this? When will it all end?" She exhaled deeply.
"Xena."
Slowly she turned towards that all too familiar voice. "Ares." She fought hard to maintain control of her raging emotions, but her stomach was already in knots and her pained eyes shown with tears.
"I know what you're thinking and it's not what you think it is! It was not what it looked like!" His voice sounded pleading.
"Then what was it, Ares?! What was it exactly?! Because from my point of view it looked like a betrayal."
"Xena no! I didn't want to! She was the one who made me."
"Am I supposed to believe that?! You're a god! No one makes you do anything! And just look at yourself. You're nearly twice her size. How could she force you?"
Ares could easily see the rage which Xena held within, and he both feared and anticipated the day she would let it all out. "Xena, I know I hurt you, and I'm sorry. What can I say? I'm sorry for all the pain I brought you. I'll do anything to make it right again."
Xena raised her head up so she became eye level with the god. She searched his eyes, and then took a step back away from him.
"Ares…I don't think it ever was right." She nearly choked on her own words as they brought even more tears to her eyes. "You and I were just not meant to be."
Ares was so taken back by her words, that for a moment he was speechless. He couldn't believe she had just said those things. "You don't mean that."
All Xena could do was nod.
"I said I was sorry. What more do you want?"
She sighed. "I need some time….Please just give me that. Please…just go away."
"I can help you. I'm sure together we can make this work."
"You've all ready helped me more than enough, Ares." Her voice was taut with anger and sarcasm. She paused just to catch her breath. "How could you do this to me? I trusted you…I even loved you."
"Xena…." He reached out to touch her, but she pulled away sharply.
"Don't…touch me."
"Listen to me…our love can't end like this…. I won't let it."
"Ares, there isn't any love left to end." With that she did a back flip into the air, landing evenly on her horse. She grabbed the reins, gave one final glance at the god, then left, never looking back.
* * * * *
That night began a series of storms, more severe in size and strength than Greece had ever seen. Xena didn't care though. She continued on her journey. The rains poured down on top of her and on Argo. Wind seemed to try to force them back while lightning crashed to the ground. Xena's mind was screaming out in pain, and her heart felt as if it would burst. So many thoughts were stirring in her head and she didn't know what to believe.
The forest seemed to be unending. No matter how fast she rode or what road she took there was no way out. No way out…just like her life. There was no way out of her curse of immortality. Now not only did she hate Ares, but she also hated Zeus. It was his fault she couldn't be with Gabrielle. It was his fault she had to endure this pain. And she began to hate Zeus more and more. She hated Ares, hated herself for letting her trust far too easily, and hated her life. She continued riding until she heard a noise.
Xena slowed her horse down to a trot. As she approached its source, she saw a light. A fire was glowing, surrounded by an army…Draco's army. Xena remembered him well. She wondered if they were even on good terms, considering their last encounter back in her hometown. She had nearly killed him, as he promised never to attack her village again. That was really the beginning of her new life, fighting for good. Xena herself had been partners with him back when she was a warlord. They had shared an army and their love.
However, she and Argo needed a little rest, and she wasn't about to go back to Ares' temple. So they found a nearby tent, which was seemingly deserted. It looked to be where they kept their battle materials such as swords and bows. It was there that they finally fell into a restless sleep.
* * * * *
In the morning Xena awoke to find herself in a completely different room on a bed. All of her armor had been removed and all the dirt that had been on her was washed away. Slowly she sat up and looked around. Draco, who had been sitting in the corner of her room, sat up and stared intently at Xena. "One of my drunken soldiers found out last night in the armory tent," he stated calmly. "I figured you'd be more comfortable here."
"Thanks for the hospitality, but I'd better be on my way." She stood up. Draco reached out and gently laid a hand on her shoulder.
"I think you need rest, Xena. You're not yourself. In fact I've never seen you like this before. I completely moved you from one tent to another and even changed your armor – none to quietly I might add – and yet you still didn't even wake up."
"Yeah…well I have a lot going on right now and the last few days…well…." She trailed off.
"Wanna tell me about it? Or are you going to make me guess?"
Xena sadly looked into his eyes. He could see all the visible pain written there and the glistening of tears in her eyes. Draco felt the urge to comfort this warrior woman before him. A woman he knew as so proud and strong was now on the verge of tears.
With a sigh Xena began her story. How it all began…with the idea of a gift, Gabrielle's death, even her time with Ares. But she also told him how she wanted to end the story, and she needed his help.
* * * * *
"I can't believe you did what you did and still want her back!"
"Strife, I was messed up at the time. I was drunk. You know how I was that night."
"But you had her! She was yours! After all those years of trying to get her back, she just agreed, and you…like an idiot, threw all that away for a one night stand!" He sighed. "I just can't believe you did that."
"I know…it was stupid, and I may have lost her forever, but I refuse to give her up without a fight."
"I dunno, Unc. You really screwed it up this time. I don't think she's going to come back. Perhaps it's time you accept that."
Little did the gods know, but at that exact moment the warrior princess was making her way towards the chamber where they were. And as she drew nearer she began to hear voices.
"Well…maybe you're right. Maybe what happened was for the better," Ares stated, very unconfidently. "I mean now I'm free to do what I want when I want to do it."
Xena slowly pushed the door open a crack and peered in, careful not to make a noise.
"I don't know think I ever really loved her in the first place. I mean I'm the god of war, and the god of war does not fall in love." He tried to convince himself that what he was saying was true, but deep down he knew it to be false. He may be able to fool others, but he could never fool himself. He was in love with her, and whether he'd admit it or not, he missed her deeply, and there was no denying it. "I know we had out moments, but frankly…if she wants to leave…I don't care." Ares nearly choked on his words.
Those words hit Xena hard. He didn't care. She nearly started to cry right then and there, but remembered her mission…what she had come here for. She'd come with the intention of reasoning with the god for one last time. But since she had heard how he felt already, there was no point in asking. She already learned what she needed to know.
"Goodbye, Xena." That was the last thing she heard him say before Xena decided she couldn't take it any longer. She bolted for the door. This time however she was no longer careful and didn't care if the gods heard.
They did hear. "Xena?" Ares only mouthed the word. Knowing she had been listening and knew what he had said, he ran after her. "Xena, wait! You don't understand!"
Once she was about ten feet from the temple, Xena slowed her pace down to a walk. She was almost in line with her army ranks, which she had posted outside Ares' temple. It was Draco's army…her army. Ares followed her out of the temple. He stopped dead in his tracks once he saw the army.
"Xena, please listen to me. Give me a chance to explain," he pleaded.
For a brief second she stopped and glanced back at the god. She slowly raised her arm. Then, turning back, let it drop. At that command her army attacked, setting the temple ablaze, and causing it to fall to the ground. It was reduced to cinders.
The temple was left in ruins…at her command. The very next day Xena…the warrior princess began a march along with her army. That temple was only the beginning of what laid ahead. She began to travel all over Greece, destroying every single temple dedicated to the god of war. Statues were destroyed, offerings were burned, and buildings crumbled. Ares could only sit back and watch as his entire mortal world collapse before his eyes at the hands of his own creation. Xena was unstoppable.
* * * * *
A month later Xena finally had found her revenge, and in a way also found the peace she so desired. The god of war was almost forgotten in the world. Soon every single temple would be gone. 'Serves him right,' she thought. 'I hope he's enjoying this.' As she stared into the flame of a small fire, which blazed forth in front of her, her mind started to wander and questions started to arise. She had been in love with him. Did he deserve what she was doing or did? She trusted him. But he did betray her before…what was so different now? She had given him chances before. Why couldn't she do the same now? When she herself was dying inside, wishing that she'd give him a chance. Her soul had been split. Part loved Ares still even after what he did…that part was buried. Part hated him, and that was the side that was dominating her actions.
The air was cold and Xena had a purple shawl draped over her shoulders. "All right Ares, I know you're here. Show yourself…or go away." 'Please show yourself!' she thought. Out of the corner of her eye she saw the god appear in front of the fire. She didn't look up. She couldn't face him.
When Ares didn't see her look up, he assumed she was still upset. "Why are you doing this, Xena? What could you possibly have to gain?"
"Personal satisfaction. The satisfaction of knowing you will feel at least some of the pain you have caused me."
"You still don't get it."
"You know what? You're right…. I don't get it. I don't get why you'd throw away everything we had. I don't get why you'd do such a thing when you know how much that was going to hurt me. And I don't get…why you stopped caring…stopped loving me."
"I never stopped loving you. I would assume you'd know that by now. I let you destroy me temples. I let you disrespect me. I let you get your revenge…. All because I knew it was what you wanted…because I knew it might help you deal…even make you a little happier. I then thought…maybe, just maybe…she'd feel satisfied enough to let me back into her heart. But you're not that easy." He paused. "I never stopped loving you."
'God's why does he have to do this?' Xena thought. "Ares…you hurt me…hurt me worse than any sword ever could. I don't know if I could go through that again…. Just answer me one question…please." Ares looked at her intently and nodded. "I need to know why. Why? Wasn't I good enough for you?"
"No…no, you're perfect."
"Then why?"
"Um…."
"The truth, Ares. Please just tell me the truth."
Xena could tell Ares was uncomfortable. He sighed. "You were gone for that entire week. I hadn't planned on your absence for more than a day…at max. That very day you returned from your 'thinking time' was the night of the marriage of Cupid and some mortal…I don't keep track of these things. Anyway, Mount Olympus held this huge reception…and since Cupid is Zeus' favorite grandchild, you can imagine how huge we're talking. He made it mandatory that every god attends. I had planned to bring you, but…you were unavailable. I didn't even know where you went. No one did. Well I needed someone to accompany me. Cleo and I were good friends…you know that. She's been a priestess in my temple since she was nine. So I asked her. I did explain to her that we were going as friends. As for the rest of the night…well we got drunk…very drunk…and well…one thing led to another." He paused and took a deep breath. "And I am so sorry. It was not like we had planned for that to happen. It just sort of…did."
He looked into Xena's eyes. "Ares, I just don't know if I can take that kind of pain again. You don't know how much it hurt."
"Oh yes I do. I felt it when you left me…when I saw you leave, unable to do a thing to stop it. I didn't mean it when I said I didn't care. Truth is, every day you were gone, my soul was dying. Like you lost a part of yourself when Gabrielle died, you took a part of me with you when you left. I am a part of you, Xena. And I will be forever. You can't deny it…accept it." Slowly he leaned towards her, and brushed her lips with his own. "Be mine again."
Like a villain you haunt me,
You cause my heart to bleed!
Inside my dying heart,
There is a never ending need.
When will you turn me loose?
Please set me free!
There is no longer a chance for you and me.
A hurt so deep, it cuts like a knife.
I must tell you goodbye, I do not want you in my life.
How will I do it, how will I survive?
I have grown to hate our final goodbye.
Our love was meant to be, why were you do blind?
Fate brought me to you, I was yours, you were mine.
Love shattered my heart, drained me of my pride.
A love so fierce, my broken heart has died.
My spirit is no longer hopeful and revived.
How could you do this awful thing to me?
Now you come, wanting a second chance,
But is there even a chance to save this romance?
-A. Phillips
*I made some changes*
"Ares…I…"
Gently he brought up a finger to Xena's soft lips, silencing them. Each touch set her body on fire, and was all consuming. She looked up into his deep eyes. There was pain obvious in them, and she guessed it was mirrored in her own. Right now she didn't know what to believe…how to feel. This feeling was completely new to her. It was like going onto a battlefield without a strategy or even weapons.
Ares eyes continued to search hers. His heart nearly broke when he saw a slight glimmer of moisture trail down her cheek. Then the realization set in. What was he doing? He did not want her…like this.
"Xena…I never meant to hurt you…that was never my plan…never what I wanted to happen. You were the best thing…are the best thing…that has ever happened to me. You are all I have left in the world. That is why I do not want to loose you…. I could not bare the thought of loosing you." He gazed deep in her glistening eyes. "But I can not bear to see you in pain…pain I know I put there…and that makes it hurt me even more. So now I see…. I understand it now. Know that I do love you, Xena…but it is because of that love that I can not bare to see you hurt again…or more than you are now. I do not wish to…but if you wish…I will leave you alone. This will be the last time you see me…if only you will tell me goodbye." He lowered his eyes from hers and felt a tear of his own travel down his cheek. His voice trailed into a pained whisper. "I do not deserve you."
Xena listened. His words seared holes in her heart. How can he say that to me? "Maybe you don't…but I…can not…deny my heart what it is feeling right now…." She slowly shook her head. "I will not tell you goodbye…I can't. My life without you would be…unbearable."
"Xena, what are you trying to say?"
Why must he rush me? Does he not know how hard this is? She breathed in deep as more tears began to fall. "I don't want you to leave me alone. Over these past months I have experienced my life without you for a second time, and it was cold. I felt nothing but pain and loneliness. It was like a continual winter, which had no hope because it would never know the summer. I miss that summer…that warmth that only you can give. Ares, I do not want you to leave me alone. I want you to be here…with me. I need you…right now I need you. I no longer wish to be alone…that is my wish." She felt Ares take her hand in his and hold it firmly, his breathing heavy. His face was now inches away from hers. "Ares…I forgive you."
Ares reached his muscled arms around her body, drawing her close. Firmly he held her in his arms, and soon felt her whole body relax. With her in his arms he felt a sort of completion, and never wanted to let go. Xena's hands roamed on nape of his neck trying to pull him still closer. She too felt this completion, and smiled. They were together again, and this time nothing would ever come between them. No force was powerful enough to separate them this time. With a bond stronger than before she decided they truly were destined to be together.
Ares pulled back a little, just to look at her beautiful face. She was smiling. How he loved it when she smiled, but she did it so rarely. Just to see that expression of joy on her face, bliss mirrored on her features, was worth dying for. "Xena…I am so sorry. It will never hap…." She cut him off with a finger to his lips.
"Now it's my turn to silence you…. None of that is important anymore. The past is in the past…. Live for the future…our future where we will be together."
"That is worth living for." Slowly he lowered his head to hers and planted a kiss on her waiting lips. The kiss was so gentle. It was not a kiss of unrequited passion, but merely one of love. It only hinted at the passion that lay behind it. Xena turned her head, exposing her neck, as his kissing made its way slowly downward. He was in no rush. Ares wanted to enjoy his night for as long as he could. He felt her pulse racing beneath his lips as he continued to plant divine kisses all down her neck. Xena shut her eyes in sheer pleasure. "Ares…I love you."
Bringing his face up, and nearly to hers, he whispered, "And I you…my princess." He pressed his lips onto hers again, and held each other tight.
Without even breaking their kiss, in a shimmer of blue light they both disappeared. They reappeared in Ares temple.
Ares hands freely roamed over Xena's back, as she urged him on with her own. Gently he tugged on the straps over his shift, which lay on her shoulders. He pulled them down, and heard a dull thud as her garment dropped to the floor. He took a moment to marvel at his princess, her firm gently tanned body. Every time he saw her was a wonderful as it had been the first time. She truly was perfect.
Xena's own hands went to work at removing his black leather. But now Ares was excited to get on with the proceedings, and decided to help out a bit. With a thought he removed what was left of his clothing. The feel of his strong bare body against hers nearly brought Xena over the edge, but she still strived to maintain some level of control. Xena noticed they had somehow gotten into Ares bedchamber. And with a push, Ares was on top of her in his bed. All at once, Xena reversed the positions and was now on top. Ares knew she had decided she was going to take control. But instead of allowing it, he quickly reversed back. Then gazed into the eyes of a very confused warrior princess. "Xena, no. Tonight I just want you to let go. No controlling…no fighting for power…nothing…. You need this. I will do the work." He slowly brushed away a lock of her raven black hair from her face, and then cupped her face gently in his hands. "Just let yourself melt into me." With a simple nod, he felt her relax beneath him, and then he descended again for a kiss.
* * * * *
"Are you serious, Herc? Xena?…our Xena?" Iolaus paced down the path next to Hercules. So many questions were running through his mind. He couldn't believe he had missed that much on his short little trip.
"Yes! I am serious…. She must have really felt at a loss after Gabrielle died."
"She must have…to go on a path of destruction that intense. You didn't tell me how you stopped her." They stopped walking down the path for a brief moment as Hercules turned to face him.
"Well now that I think about it…I wasn't really responsible for it. It's a long story. But from what I have heard, is it was actually Ares that pushed her away."
"Ares?! You're kidding me. After all that time he spent trying to get her back? I would think he'd be overjoyed…especially because she became his lover."
"Oh he definitely was happy…in fact I don't think I've ever seen him happier. Now I'm not sure of the details…this is just what I have been hearing…but for some reason he cheated on Xena, she found out…then left. It was as simple as that." He looked at Iolaus. "But all that really matters is she changed…again."
"Yeah. I just can't believe she would ever do such a thing. You haven't talked to her recently have you?" He glanced up at him questioningly.
"No. At the time I didn't think she could stand talking to me."
"Well right now she may be in some pain. It was probably a bad breakup, and also because of the initial death of Gabrielle…. I think we should at least find her to make sure she's okay."
Hercules nodded. "You're right. I would like to see her again." They quickened their pace as they continued down the dirt road.
* * * * *
On top of her horse she felt like a queen. She sat above the world. Xena looked around her. Thousands of warriors prepared for the battle…a battle that would be remembered through the centuries. All she could hear was the sound of swards clashing…practice. They had been trained well…and will win. The largest city in Greece will fall…Sparta. A cool breeze blew through her hair, sending it back over her shoulders. Xena breathed in deep. How could she leave this? This was her home. This was where she belonged. Here she was free. Suddenly she felt strong arms wrap around her waist, and a firm body behind her. Relaxing, she leaned into him. "Ares…."
"You have no idea how good it feels to hold you."
"Now…if I remember correctly, we've done this whole scene before…. Will you be here when I get back?"
"Xena, you have my word. I will never leave you. That's a promise."
"Good." She shifted her position in his arms, bringing her face close so his. "And when I get back…," she whispered in his ear.
"We will celebrate your victory," he stated, finishing her sentence. He gently brushed his lips up against hers. "Any choice of wine?" His voice grew rich and seductive.
She smiled. "Who'll have time to drink."
"Oooh." He pressed his mouth onto hers. She slid her hand underneath his vest. He pulled her close. Suddenly she pulled away.
"No. Not now…you'll just have to wait till I return." She was teasing him…and he knew it. But how he loved her for it.
He cocked an eyebrow, and smiled. "Very well." Gently he took her hand in his, brought her palm up to his lips, and planted a kiss. "Until then, my dear." Then he disappeared.
Slowly she shook her head, still smiling. 'Oh well, duty calls,' she thought. Drawing her sword, she held it up in front of her. The sun gleamed off of it. A glint of light caught her eye, and she breathed in deep. Today she will show people how strong she actually is. Xena kicked her horse, and then headed out into her army of soldiers. Nearing the front, she started to slow down.
In front of her was probably the largest army Greece had ever known. She took a deep breath. "Everyone," she proclaimed with a loud voice, "today is a day that will go down in history. Every one of you here today will be working to make history. So let's make it good. What will we do?" With confidence she sat up straight and thrusted her sword into the air. "We'll kill 'em all!" she shouted. That brought a rise from the men. Everyone started to cheer, feeling their purpose and the importance of this next battle. The bloodlust shown in their eyes, and Xena felt the anxiety building in her veins. She smiled viscously, and then lowered her arm.
Before she left she saw Ares. He was standing behind everyone, watching her with great interest. She quickly caught his eye, and he gave her one of his devilish grins. Just knowing that he'd be watching gave Xena even more of a thrill. For her, it was almost an erotic foreplay. Killing was part of their passion, and that made it even more exhilarating. She knew what she'd be returning to, but more importantly what awaited her in battle. Kicking her horse, she started on her way, with an entire army of men following.
Soon Sparta was coming into view. Xena could see people scurrying about in their daily lives, completely oblivious to what was about to happen. They had no defense, no warning. For a second the concept of morality slipped into her mind, but she pushed it out as quickly as it came. In order to do this, she had to be like she was before. Xena sat there a moment, just watching. A mother had just bought something from a street vender, with the little child tagging along, skipping joyfully. An older man was out for a walk, holding his cane. Then she saw a woman. This woman was simply standing there, staring straight at her. Xena wondered how she even noticed, since they were still a good distance away. As she stared at this woman, she noticed something. Inside her she could she a vengeful goddess. Velasca. Such was this woman's resemblance that Xena found her heart beginning to harden. All that was in her mind now, was Gabrielle being killed by Velasca. With such a woman, this village deserved to be destroyed. And with the last shred of doubt pushed out of her heart, Xena felt she was now ready. "Well…time to make history," she mumbled to herself.
The army began their descent upon the village like wolves to their prey. Throughout the village her war cry echoed. The people, who had realized the danger far too late, were running around frantically trying to get in their houses or run away. A few farmers tried to stand up and make a fight. Xena watched as her army crushed them instantly.
Though the large town did have an extensive and well-trained army, it had already been too late for it to mobilize though. Their only defense was scanty groups of men, armed with only a sword each. Her army seemed to rip through the town, and she reviled in it. Though Xena decided she would have liked it better if there was more of a challenge. She needed a worthy opponent. Aimlessly she began to twirl her sword, strolling further down the street and into the town. Her mind drifted to Ares. He was so good to her. She began to wish he was here. How could I have ever thought I could live without him, she began to wonder.
No sooner had she thought that than he was by side. Gently he placed one hand on her shoulder from behind and the other around her waist, pulling her close. She sighed contently and leaned in. "You need not even call, Xena. Just think of me and I shall appear," he whispered into her ear. "I would drop everything for you."
Xena began to feel the heat spreading throughout her body. "Just to have you here…." She trailed off, too content to even respond.
"I know, sweet. I know."
Xena could feel her body relaxing, feeling so protected. She was in the middle of a battle. The town around her was crumbling to pieces. People were dying. Yet she felt nothing…saw nothing. Xena and Ares were in their own world, where nothing could touch them.
"Looks like your job is being well done," he commented casually.
"Did you think otherwise?"
"Never."
Xena shut her eyes as his hand began to roam is circles around on her stomach.
Xena and Ares watched as a man was killed right in front of them. This had been one of the few men to put up a fight with her soldiers. He died at her feet with an arm having fallen over her boot. 'Serves him right,' she thought. No one can resist.
"You see, Xena?"
"What?" She looked back at him.
"Everyone will bow…or fall…to you. You are my queen, and I will make sure you are treated like the queen you deserve to be." His voice grew rich and seductive.
"I am a queen…who has found my king…."
"And with whom you shall rule." He finished her sentence.
Xena looked up when she heard a woman scream. It brought her back to reality. "Well…this is my fight, Ares. And I would much rather be a participant than an observer."
"I know."
"Will you be leaving then?" 'Please let him say no…please let him say no,' she thought.
"And miss seeing my warrior princess work? I wouldn't dream of it."
Xena smiled gratefully and moved out of his strong grip. Holding up her sword covered in blood, she decided to join in the battle. As every one of Xena's blows made contact, Ares shared in her excitement. Every single drop of blood that fell on her also fell on him. This was how close their bond was. Ares knew Xena felt this as well, for she preformed with emotion greater than before.
Every move seemed to enchant Ares. He watched her closely. Xena felt compelled to please him, so she decided to give him a show.
Twirling her sword, she began her beautifully violent dance. Ares mouth nearly dropped. She performed with the grace of a princess but the strength and bloodlust of a warrior. At this moment Ares knew exactly why she was called the warrior princess. The title would have never suited anyone else. Xena completely destroyed everything in her path. 'Magnificent,' Ares thought. With a thought, he made himself invisible, and passed through her body, reappearing at the other side to face her. She stopped fighting and stared into his eyes.
"Ares…Did you come here to prevent my fighting?"
"No. Only to motive and to join." He pulled out his sword.
"Then together…let's destroy this village."
"It would be my pleasure." Xena smiled.
As one, they began their bloody march through the village. Having lost all hope, the town collapsed. Blood covered its once fruitful ground. It was late evening when the battle finally concluded. Very few were left standing. It had been catastrophic for both sides.
Xena and Ares stood in the middle of it all. He had his arm around her waist, holding her protectively. Surrounding them was a field of bodies.
He breathed in deeply, letting the smells from the battle fill him. "Look around you, Xena. On this day you have made…history. The name Xena will never be forgotten."
"Neither will her lover's."
Smiling, Ares arched an eyebrow. "You know, one year ago you would have never even dreamed of calling me that."
"No…see that is where you are wrong. I have always loved you…. I just wouldn't let myself admit it."
"Because of Gabrielle?"
Xena flinched as a sharp pain stung her heart when he said Gabrielle. "No…not just because of her. I was the problem. I couldn't allow you to be in my life…not with the path I was headed in."
"But now…?"
"But now everything is different. I've realized something. All that time I was walking a path I was never destined to walk in the first place. I was denying my true self."
"I could have told you that, Xena. Sometimes I look back and wish I could have changed what happened to Gabrielle…just to spare you that pain. But then I think of what's happened now…to us. And I couldn't bear the thought of my life without you…. I doubt I would have brought her back…. Do you hate me for this?"
Xena studied his eyes. Gently she brought up her hand to stroke the side of his face, trailing her fingers along the outline of his cheek. "No…I don't. Ares, I am thankful for what happened. I would not change it even if I could. It brought me to you."
Ares shut his eyes to let her words sink in. Then, wrapping a hand around her neck, he descended for a kiss. Their lips had almost touched when suddenly they head a voice shout out Xena's name. Both of them turned towards its source.
"Hercules…so good of you to come," Xena called out to him.
"Xena! I thought you were over him! Why would you let him subject you to more harm?!" His voice was rising with anger.
"Because I love him. I can not help the way I feel."
"He's corrupted you! Why can't you see that?"
Having heard enough, Ares decided to put an end to this. "Enough!"
"Ares, I am not here to talk to you. I came to see Xena. Stay out of this!"
"But I am very much in this already. And anyway, Xena does not wish to be disturbed right now. We have to celebrate our victory."
"You mean slaughter! Ares, let her go!" he shouted sternly.
"Never!" Grabbing Xena's hand, Ares turned to leave. He was not in the mood o deal with this. However, Xena pulled away from his grasp and turned to face Hercules.
"Hercules, why won't you just accept this?" Xena's voice was pleading.
He looked around the field. "Look around you…. What do you see?"
"A victory."
"Well that's not what I see. I see death…. I see suffering." He turned to look at Xena. "And I see a murderer."
"Murderer?"
"Yes. You killed innocents, Xena. They have done nothing to you."
"It was for the greater good."
"No, Xena. You can't believe that. Now listen to me. I know there is good inside you. Please…I beg you. Do not become the monster you were."
"I fight with Ares now. Nothing you do can change that."
"Xena…you know I care for you…a great deal. That is why I am so involved right now."
"Hercules…I've spent an entire life time following my head, trying to tell the difference between right and wrong. And now…after everything…all I have is a lifetime of regret. For once I am going to follow my heart. And…."
"Xena…." Hercules was looking desperate.
"I love…."
"Don't!" His voice was a warning.
"Ares."
Hercules stood silently for a moment. "You know I must stop you. I can't let you do this."
"You'll do what you feel you must." Xena saw the pain in his eyes, and truthfully it hurt her as well. But it would hurt her more in a life without Ares. Ares was standing a few yards behind her. He stood triumphantly although a look of pure hatred was visible on his face whenever he looked at his half-brother. He waited patiently for his princess.
Xena turned her back to Hercules, preparing to leave. Suddenly Hercules screamed her name. She turned to him. With tears in his eyes, he rushed forward, plunging a dagger deep into Xena's chest. She had no time to react.
Xena gasped at the impact, and looked down at the knife which he held in his hand. I was the Hind's Blood Dagger. 'How did he get it?' she wondered. Right away she knew it would be fatal. She already could feel the energy beginning to leave her body, as her lifeblood began to flow freely onto Hercules' hand.
"No!" Ares screamed as loudly as he could. Rushing over to Xena's side, he pulled her free from the dagger. He gently cradled her on the bloody grass. Hercules stepped back, allowing them their last moments together.
"No…." Ares said softly. Warm tears began to roll down his cheek.
"Ares…." She couldn't talk in anything but a pained whisper.
"I'm here sweet. You're going to be okay. I'm going to get you fixed up and everything's going to be just like it was before." His voice was breaking.
"Liar…. I can see it in your eyes." Xena tried to smile, but every move was an extreme effort.
"Xena, you can't leave me…. Please don't go. I beg you." His entire face was wet from tears, and his eyes told her how hurt he truly was. "Don't leave me."
"I never will." Slowly Xena brought up her fingers to his face. "I didn't know gods cried."
"No one ever has…until now." He took her extended hand and grasped it firmly in his.
"Don't worry for me, Ares…. I am not afraid." Her breathing was getting faint.
"I know," he stated and gave her hand a squeeze.
"And I want you to know that I regret nothing. I would change nothing. Ares, I love you."
"And I you…my queen." Tenderly he pressed his lips onto hers, trying to remember everything.
With his lips still pressed against hers, he felt Xena breathe her last breath, and her heart silenced. Her fingers slipped out of his hand. And as quickly as she had come into his life, she was gone.
Unable to control himself anymore, Ares buried his head in his hands, crying. He had lost the only thing in his world he ever loved. He lived centuries before, but this was the only time he was truly alive. Nothing mattered now. He was alone. Ares looked at the face of his beloved. Even in death she was beautiful. He smoothed a strand of hair away form her face. He watched as a drop of water came down and hit her face. He looked up. It was raining. 'Now no one can tell my tears form the rain,' he thought.
Then he saw it…the way out. Right next to Xena was the answer to all his problems…the way he could be reunited with his love. On the grass laid the dagger. With trembling hands he picked it up, and raised it up to the sky. Ares took one last look at his princess. "I love you, Xena. You are my light, my reason, my life…. And I can not live without you." Finishing that sentence, he plunged the dagger deep into his heart. With his last bit of strength he laid down next to Xena, holding her closely. He died in her arms.
And the rest was silent…except for the falling rain.
* * * * *
"Gabrielle had once said that everyone was born with four arms and four legs. But then Zeus threw down thunderbolts and split everyone in two. They now had two arms and two legs. But even though they were separated, they knew a part of themselves were missing, and in turn felt a desperate longing to be reunited. Now everyone on earth spends their life just trying to find the other part of their soul. Not everyone is lucky enough to them. Only certain people do…."
"But I thought you said there was no possible way Xena and Ares could truly be in love?" Iolaus asked.
Hercules looked at him. "Well…it appears I was wrong."
Time adds up the hours
By the moments of the day
And the heart that bears life's burdens
Is the one who stops to pray
For all those precious moments
Are as grains of sand from the sea
And with every tiny tear that's shed
We form our victory
Soon the sand becomes the mountain
Built upon love's gift
And the flow of time can not erase
Nor wash our world adrift
And so as surely as the sea
Rises to meet the shore
The mountain of our victory
Shall stand forever more
-J. Russell
*I made some changes*
Please e-mail the author of this story with your comments. XenaAresForever@aol.com