Disclaimer: This story is purely for fun, and to keep the people from the Xena and Ares shippers club from going crazy, I get no profit from this story. The characters ECT as well as the story idea belong to me. The characters Xena, Gabrielle, Cyrene, and Ares ECT. Do not belong to me, and I am just borrowing them. No copy write infringement intended. Please do not use this story on your web site, web page ECT. Without first asking me and receiving my permission, you may however use this story for private use, but must use it with all disclaimers. If you would like to send this story to a friend, please ask me first, and receive my permission, and you must not get any profit from the transaction. I get no profit from this story in anyway, so please don't sue me!!
Authors note: Wow that was a pretty long disclaimer wasn't it?? I hope I got everything in though; I don't want anybody to take this story the wrong way! If the idea of Xena and Ares in love, of them having any past relationship, or if Gabrielle and Xena being 'just friends' is not the type of story you want to read, please go someplace else. This takes place in Season 6, I suppose. Uh… What was up with Gabrielle’s ‘I’m SPECIAL’ act in the episode ‘Gabrielle’s Hope’? She was all ‘The violence was going to stop with me! I was going to save all man kind!’ That was weird. Will someone tell her she isn’t so special?!?
More Author’s Notes: Ok, it’s really hard to find good scene scripts for episodes, and I saw this awhile ago, so basically I’m adding some of my own scenes and I’m jumping past some scenes from the episode, so just put those scenes in between the ones I wrote to. But yeah, if you see some major screw up, or if you can give a REALLY detailed summary of the episode ‘Gabrielle’s Hope’ I’d REALLY, REALLY, REALLY, REALLY appreciate it!! If you can/do/have ideas e-mail me @ goddess_delenn@yahoo.com Also, warning, I am only writing in the scenes that are important to the frame-line, ‘cause… well… that’s all I’m doing of them!
Dedications: This story is for Barb, Kat, Illy, G.O.M, Noie, Liz, SR, Tareena, Tali, Eris, GA, AC, Reeny, LK, Carly, Everyone I missed, and for everyone at the shippers club for their support, and for liking my stories, even when I didn't!
Warnings: Sex: It’s assumed, but there’s nothing really more graphic then kissing. Subtext: NO. Language: Nope. Violence: Just a little.
Rated: PG-15
Now for the story!!!!! *Everyone claps, glad to be rid of the disclaimers*
Xena had been sitting out by the water in the pre-dawn light, ears constantly listening for intruders that would force her back to camp and a fitfully sleeping Gabrielle.
The warrior hadn’t been able to sleep, and now she was settling for the alone time so that she could think.
In a flash of light that had Xena standing in a second with her sword drawn, angel Callisto appeared.
This newer and forever slightly oblivious version of Callisto smiled, and began sweetly, “I have been told that I owe you a favor, Xena, so I will do anything you ask.” She finished her little speech with a half bow.
Sinking back down to sit, if not still wary about the angel’s presence, Xena thought about such an offer.
The warrior princess remembered all the different versions of Callisto she had known, versions she had helped to create, however unwillingly.
The young woman that wanted revenge, the insane and obsessed goddess, and the goddess without meaning to her life, the once again obsessed demon. Finally there was the one here now, the perfect, redeemed - peaceful - angel.
Somehow thoughts of Callisto brought her round to Ares, who she had been deliberating on and off about most of the night. He was currently so angry with her that he wasn’t even speaking to her now, he’d given up on her, and frankly she didn’t blame him, apparently tricking people wasn’t an appealing trait.
Not to mention what had happened to Gabrielle, another thing that had been distracting Xena from her sleep, the still young bard didn’t even write anymore.
There were so many things that had gone wrong, that Xena wished she could change, that was her life, and Callisto expected her to pick one?
It actually didn’t take Xena long to find the thing she regretted most, Solan’s death. The only question was how to change it, the warrior knew enough about the Fates to know that simply going back to right before he died wouldn’t fix it. Hope would have found another way and…. Hope.
Mind made up, Xena spared one last, fleeting glance around her and hoped she wasn’t making the wrong decision, “Alright Callisto, to make up for the ‘favor’ that you owe me; make everything like it was before Hope was born,” she smiled slightly to herself, glad that she would be able to spare Gabrielle the pain of her encounter with Dahak and the evil spawn her friend had tried to love. “But,” Xena continued hastily, “I have to be able to remember.” So the same mistakes don’t happen again.
Giving another little bow, “Request granted,” when she looked up again Callisto nodded and gave a little wink that was oddly reminiscent of her non-angel self.
Before Xena had time to wonder if things were changing right before her eyes, everything started to spin, slow at first then faster, white light permeating through as though this new god couldn’t do anything without that blinding color.
And then, everything was black and falling, like falling off the edge of awareness and into the unknown.
Part One-
Being thrown back in time was a strange feeling to say the least, somewhat nauseating, and a good deal disorientating. It was hard for the warrior princess to even assert where exactly she was, but it certainly didn’t seem familiar to her surroundings prior to the Meridian debacle. She hoped desperately that she was in Greece, already feeling uncomfortable about her “wish.”
There was stirring next to her and Gabrielle sat up and looked at Xena. “I had that dream again.”
Such a simple line, but it wasn’t something Xena had ever forgotten, this wasn’t before Hope, this was literally right before Hope’s birth. Xena sighed, knowing that left up to angel Callisto, of course the outcome would be wrong… And she couldn’t even warn Gabrielle; it was both too late and not time yet. “Yeah, I know…”
Gabrielle rolled over and threw up. Xena sighed again and patted her friends back, “It’s part of the same thing, Gabrielle. Your body and dreams are just reacting to your first kill.”
Gabrielle sat up again, her stomach calmer for the moment. “I’ll never forgive myself.”
Xena sighed inwardly. “It was instinct.” Something she knew all about.
Gabrielle seemed determined that this was her fault. “No, you’re wrong I made the decision to kill her. I went against everything I stand for!”
Xena tried to comfort her friend, while avoiding thinking of the other reason for Gabrielle’s upset stomach. “I know it's hard. I remember my first kill ... You are going to get through this thing. You are going to wake up one day and have hope again. You'll see there's so much good to be done.”
Gabrielle attempted to explain, “Maybe. I just feel like I should be punished for what I’ve done.”
Xena nodded, thinking how strange it was that she remembered every word that she had said before in such detail. “You are being punished by your conscience. For someone like you, there couldn’t be a worse torture.”
~(*)~
That afternoon Xena asked carefully as she watched the sun travel the sky and assessed her free time with the events that were already in motion, “Did you finish the herbs I gave you?”
Pitifully, Gabrielle nodded, “Yeah,” slightly bitterly, she pointed out the obvious, “but it’s not doing any good.”
Forcing the slightly confused words out of her mouth, Xena asked again, “And the pressure points didn’t work either. You’ve got it bad,” she had to get going soon if this was going to work…
Knowing that both of them would need as much cheering up as possible, Xena attempted to make a joke. She added, just as she had the first time, “On the bright side, sea sickness will be a romp after this.”
Gabrielle sighed dejectedly, completely missing the joke and considering this statement the perfect ending to what was already a horrible time. “That’s right. We’re getting on a boat.”
Xena nodded, “Unfortunately, it’s the only way to get back to Greece.” Well there was ONE other way.
Gabrielle agreed; she wanted to get back to Greece soon, “Well, I guess I’ll be glad to get off this island. Britannia didn’t turn out to be my favorite place.”
~(*)~
Gabrielle asked weakly, "Maybe I'll get something to eat."
Xena nodded, her time was limited and all she wanted right now was to get Gabrielle settled down for a bit. "Yeah, that'd be great if you could manage...” she turned to the hovering tavern keeper, “Have you got any chicken broth?"
The tavern keeper dutifully replied, "Yeah."
Xena smiled as she hurried out of her seat and on her way to the door, so far this was working out okay. "There you go, that should go down pretty easy. I'll be back soon."
Gabrielle watched her friend leave, surprised at how appealing the idea of food was right now. "Hey, could I have some cherries, too, please?”
Looking at the somewhat surprised and greatly disturbed tavern keeper, Gabrielle continued her requests as her mind shouted them out to her with astounding clarity. “... And some beef jerky ... hmm, pork livers, if you've got it. I mean, don't over cook it. I like it bloody...”
Gabrielle had no idea where these sudden desires were coming from, she was sure that she had never wanted bloody pork livers before in her life. Yet, right now, it was all she wanted, and it sounded so appealing. She must have just been missing out before. “You know, if you melt some cheese over it that would be perfect..."
Now eating her previous order as it was delivered to her piece by piece, Gabrielle asked, cravings overwhelming her. "Can I have some more goat's cream, please?”
The tavern keeper retreated quickly to fulfill yet another order from the strange and terrifying young woman who was chowing down on a disgusting array of foods. Not daunted, Gabrielle called out, barely pausing in her gorging, “... Hey, if you have any chicken gizzards, you just fry them in sheep lard ... send them my way."
Shuddering, the tavern keeper hoped that her friend would come to collect this woman soon and that she had the money to pay for such bizarre extravagances.
~(*)~
Xena walked out to a somewhat secluded field, there was no way she was going against those banshee’s again until she could properly kick their asses. Besides, a bunch of howling women trying to kill her really wouldn’t help her plan. “Ares! Ares, I…” she took a deep breath and continued in a slightly more forced tone, “need your help.”
Ares appeared with his arms crossed over his chest. “Oh really? It’s gonna cost you.”
Xena rolled her eyes, being able to predict this outcome without the advantages of having done it all before, “Yeah, I know.”
Ares tried not to look as surprised as he was; Xena never accepted his rules, “Well then, what do you want help with, princess?”
Xena chose her words carefully, it wouldn’t do to seem like she knew everything and Ares knew her well enough to tell when she was lying to him, mostly that was. “You know that cult that Gabrielle got caught up in?”
Ares fringed offence, while trying to remember what she was on about. “Xena, I have better things to do then watch you and Bardies every move.” At Xena’s raised eyebrow he shrugged, “Fine, yeah I remember. Why?”
Xena looked down at the ground, she had to remember the games her and Ares played… it had been awhile. “They’re a problem, I want to get rid of them.”
Ares uncrossed his arms and reclined against a tree. This was an interesting development. “And…” He prompted.
“And,” Xena continued to study the ground, common reason was kicking in again, and she was a bit unsure of this. “I need a god’s help.”
Ares studied his warrior princess intently. Was she serious about needing his help, or was this just another ploy? He gently tilted her head up so that he was looking into her crystal blue eyes and smirked at the grudging truth he saw, “What would I get out of it?”
Part Two-
A loud shriek was heard and Gabrielle asked, worried, "What was that?"
Xena sighed; in all the excitement of plans and stress of making sure no events got changed before the right time, she had forgotten about them, "I don't know. It was too high-pitched to be a wolf. Let's get out of these woods."
Glancing around her nervously, Gabrielle nodded. Leaving and leaving quickly certainly seemed like the most prudent idea. Gods, she disliked this Britannia! "Good idea."
Exactly on their unknown cue, the Banshees appeared and swarmed around them, all of them repetitively saying, "Gabrielle, we honor you!"
Greatly confused, Gabrielle watched Xena fighting the strange creatures as they purposely ignored the bard herself, "Xena! I don't know why, but they won't attack me."
Xena shrugged, forcing herself to fight off the banshees to avoid altering the future. Perhaps fighting was the wrong word, running about and missing them was more correct. Stupid, damn, Banshees! "Good, all the more for me."
Sighing as she watched her stubborn friend get beat up, Gabrielle asked, "Would you just stay behind me?"
Xena shook her head, this was how the story went, besides, she needed to get her mind off of things, "I'm gonna kick these ladies' butts."
Trying the last possible tactic that she could think of, Gabrielle moaned, "Xena, will you please?! I don't feel well at all."
Knowing first off that her friend was probably in real pain, and second that this was the end of the story, Xena said to the Banshees, "Well, this is your lucky day. My friend's not feeling well." Before going back to where Gabrielle was sitting and waiting for her before they got out of there.
The Banshees cried out after the retreating bard, "Gabrielle, we mean you no harm. We're your friends. We love you. We worship you. Let us Banshees care for you. You are the chosen one, Gabrielle."
~(*)~
Once they were out of the accursed forest, Gabrielle couldn’t help but ask, even though she already knew the answer. "The banshees, are they human?"
"I've only heard stories,” Xena answered, even though she already knew too well how true they were, “but it seems they take on mortal features just before they strike, then they go back into shade form once they strike you.” Sighing loudly, she added, “I was just getting their timing."
The young bard suppressed a shudder, contrary to her friend’s reassuring tone; she knew that Xena had not been just getting their timing. And when something was powerful enough to beat up her friend… "Xena, what do you think they wanted with me?"
Shrugging, Xena tried for a light and reassuring tone again, hoping it would be enough to mask the fact that she was lying through her teeth, "Who knows? It's just another reason to get out of Britannia and back to Greece."
~(*)~
“You know, it wasn’t very easy getting rid of a whole other god’s group of minions, out of my territory, and without anybody finding out.”
Spinning around, Xena regarded the mock pout that Ares was sporting, already knowing that such things wouldn’t have bothered him, even if he had been caught. “But you did it.”
Cocky smirk firmly in place, Ares took a few steps forward and noted with approval that Xena didn’t move back. “Of course, my dear…” he circled around her and pulled Xena up against him, lowering his voice and adding, “Were you doubting my abilities?”
Glad that he couldn’t see the grin on her face, Xena bit her lip to keep it away before turning around in his grasp. Not missing the new meaning at all, Xena breathed, “I never had any doubts…” she watched his slight intake of breath with satisfaction.
Regaining his footing quickly at Xena’s change in attitude and firmly reminding himself that he was more or less used to her like this, Ares raised an eyebrow and asked, “So, on to business I suppose.”
Not very inclined to move, even if she wasn’t already sure that his grip was like steel around her, Xena raised a matching eyebrow and asked, “Business?” As though she could have forgotten.
The god of war was not entirely sure whether this was a sign that she was accepting or about to back out, as she had done in many other situations. Figuring there was only one way to find out, Ares continued, “More specifically, the terms of our deal.”
“Hope’s not dead yet,” Xena bit her tongue at the slip up, dropping her eyes away from Ares and moving to get out of his arms.
Ignoring the mistake, Ares tightened his grip, not about to let Xena leave yet. He waited for her now slightly annoyed blue orbs to meet his eyes again before grinning recklessly, “That can be arranged…”
Before Xena had time to wonder whether he knew what she was talking about or if she even knew what she was talking about, Ares’ lips had met hers.
She allowed herself to get caught up in the kiss for a few moments, as it was not unexpected, then took advantage of Ares’ loosened grip and slipped away from him, trying to catch her breath as she raised an amused eyebrow and announced, “Gabrielle’s sleeping.”
“Hmm,” Ares pretended to think about this matter while studying Xena. The warrior certainly didn’t look nearly as angry as she was only half-heartedly pretending to be. Decision made, he took two strides forward, grabbed Xena round the waist, and shrugged, “Oh well.”
A flash of blue light greeted his statement, as both the warrior princess and god of war were gone.
Part Three-
Casting a glance at her friend for the umpteenth time to make sure that her absence hadn’t been noticed and that her thoughts weren’t apparent, Xena let out a relieved sigh.
As Gabrielle looked up, Xena shook her head as though baffled and spoke quietly, as though the matter of the Banshees had been bothering her for some time. "They were very strange."
Feeling somewhat better, Gabrielle couldn’t help but offer the best comeback that she could think of, "Yeah, you're telling me, and I thought our immortals were freaks."
Trying to hide both her fond smile and the memories, both in this past and in the other one, which came to her at this statement, Xena managed to sound part way joking and part way disapproving, "Yeah, but they're our freaks."
~(*)~
Watching her friend warily from her spot nearby, Xena questioned with real concern, "You alright?" Even though she already knew that her best friend was far from okay, either physically or emotionally.
It took Gabrielle a second to organize her thoughts enough to form a reply. “Yeah, my stomach's feeling better.” She said that first, figuring that Xena meant physically.
She was silent for another moment, before turning pleadingly on her friend, begging for Xena to find some way to make everything all better, even though she knew that even Xena couldn’t just go back in time and fix everything. “It's just ... my soul. Xena, I thought that Khrafstar was leading me to the salvation of the world through Peace and Light ... and instead, I discovered the heart of Darkness.”
Looking deep into Xena’s eyes, Gabrielle wondered if maybe her friend could see the evil in her the way Gabrielle could see the good in Xena. It was hard to tell. So, Gabrielle struggled to finish her thoughts out loud. “I became a part of that. I think that that's what the Banshees were talking about, that maybe there's an Evil in me and they want to worship me."
Thinking of just what she had in mind to kick Gabrielle back to reality, Xena spoke firmly but as reassuringly as she could. “Now, you stop that! Gabrielle, what you're talking now is nonsense. What happened in that temple cannot destroy the core of your Goodness.”
She allowed herself a brief pause to hope that her friend’s innate goodness would stay intact for a long time in this world… “It only gave it a greater challenge. You're going to rise above it, I know you will.”
In reality, Xena didn’t just know, she aimed to make sure of it. Knowing how everything ended for the worse gave Xena a chance to fix what had gone wrong, and she wasn’t going to let Gabrielle doubt her goodness ever again, not when it was so often the only thing that kept the warrior princess on the right path.
~(*)~
Looking around the old castle nervously, Xena turned from the passage she had ‘just’ found and back to Goewin. Even more wary of waking her sleeping friend than before, she whispered, “I'm gonna go see where our little friend went. You stay here, and look after Gabrielle and the baby.”
Goewin nodded and watched as Xena disappeared from sight. Hope was crawling around, her accelerated growth making her much older than her day. “Come here, sweetheart. Oh! What's the matter? Can't sleep? Oh, come here.”
He smiled fondly at the babe, at her miraculous innocence, and hoped he would get to have a child of his own someday. Hope, however, seemed suddenly fascinated with the medallion on a chain around his neck. He let her play with it, happy that she’d found something that interested her. “Look, look. Look up, look up, look. Come here. Come on.”
From her spot just out of view, piercing blue eyes watched all that was going on. She hadn’t needed to follow Iochid this time to know that he was a traitor and that the banshee’s were coming. It wouldn’t matter because Iochid would never get time to give his invitation.
Seeing how Goewin played with Hope pained her even more now that she knew her suspicions about Hope had been more than accurate. Of all the people Hope had killed in Xena’s other world memories, Goewin had been the first, and Xena wasn’t about to let that happen this time.
Stepping back into the room, Xena took several long but silent strides and bent down in front of Goewin and the girl-child. Quietly, she said, “I didn’t find him. I’m sure you were right, Goewin, nothing to worry about.”
She looked down at the babe and couldn’t help but have the same feeling as always that Hope was evil, even this young. “Hey there, doesn’t look like somebody wants to go to sleep, huh?” Quite unexpectedly, Hope reminded her of Eve as a baby, and Xena could only pray that her choice hadn’t erased Eve from her life forever. She focused instead on Goewin, “I’m feeling a bit restless, gonna wander around for a bit. Why don’t I take Hope, and you can get some sleep?”
Both Goewin and Hope seemed surprised at this development. Hope, so much so, that at the warrior’s near proximity she had dropped the potentially life ending medallion and sat staring unblinkingly at Xena. Reluctantly, Goewin nodded, knowing that he would probably tire before either Xena or Hope and that they would do better off for the night. “If you’re sure… I don’t mind…”
Reaching out quickly, Xena gathered Hope up in her arms and ignored the warning tingle that went down her spine at the lithe little… creature… that she was holding. “I got it, wanted to spend some time with the little one.” She nodded towards Gabrielle, “besides, if Hope gets cranky, she won’t wake up her mommy.”
Seemingly appeased with the validity of Xena’s suggestion, Goewin settled down to keep an eye out for Gabrielle. He spared a little wave at Hope.
However, Xena was wasting no time, well aware that Hope knew more about what was going on than most people, let alone children. She turned quickly and kept Hope bundled in her arms as she left the room. No turning back now.
~(*)~
Only a few rooms away and Hope started to scream. She glared up at the warrior-woman who carried her far away from her mother and bellowed her little lungs out.
Luckily, Xena had been prepared for anything that might wake Gabrielle up and cost her plan dearly, and had made certain… arrangements… so that she wouldn’t be heard while she was with the baby.
Which, on further thought, could have been why her senses had prickled when she held Hope, not just that the child was evil. Mothering instincts were hard to ignore though, and Xena bounced her step slightly, a small rocking motion to calm the babe. “Shh now, you and Auntie Xena are just going on a little trip…”
Eyes closed tightly as she sought out the room in the castle that she had chosen earlier. Xena would not allow herself to be distracted by those pretty green eyes and that innocent stare. Hope was evil, she knew it, had seen the spawn of Dahak about to strangle the kind Goewin.
And yet, she could appreciate Gabrielle’s position. So many people had thought that Eve was evil, and they had been wrong. Xena had felt it inside of her, and known that they were wrong. Yet, Eve had grown up to slaughter people, just like mommy, before her reform.
A part of Xena asked how Hope was so different. If Xena had gotten to raise Eve properly, to be with her, she knew that Eve would have never traveled such a bloody path. And what of Hope, if she got to be raised with Gabrielle, wouldn’t she be redeemable?
No, Xena shook such thoughts away. She had seen Hope’s evil nature, the deaths of too many innocents on her hands before the girl was even more than five real years old. Dahak’s influence was too strong in the girl. Hope was not a child, but a vessel for Dahak’s evil, and if she lived then her only path would be that of death and destruction.
Almost unconsciously, Xena’s grip had slowly tightened while she went through her little internal debate. There was no question in her mind, despite her want to save Gabrielle the grief of losing a child; Hope was evil. Xena had always known it, felt it, and now she’d seen it more times than she wanted to count.
The squalling stopped, and Xena looked down again into those large, clear eyes, as they glared up in anger. Little fists were made on her skin, miniscule nail marks left, but Xena held fast. Slowly, those unblinking eyes closed, and Xena knew they wouldn’t open again. Not even for all of Dahak’s schemes. Xena would be there to stop any rebirth attempts.
Quietly, as she cradled the now stilling babe, Xena sighed, “I’m sorry I couldn’t save you… Hope…”
And she set the child down on the stone table just in front of her. Sounds came rushing back at the warrior princess and she knew that the connection of her presence being masked had been broken. Still softer, “I’m sorry…” then louder, she forced the pain into her voice and cried out, “GABRIELLE!”
Part Four-
The sound of her friend’s pained scream was what first woke Gabrielle. At first, Gabrielle’s only thought was to wonder where she was and where Xena was. Then it all came flooding back to her, and she sat bolt upright, scanned the room, saw Goewin… “What’s going on? Where’s Hope?!” Her voice ended slightly high-pitched and frightened.
Goewin was already standing, trying to figure out whether to go investigate what had caused Xena to scream or to follow her request and stay with Gabrielle, make sure that nothing happened to the young woman. “I don’t know. Don’t worry, Hope’s with Xena.”
Taking a deep breath, Gabrielle stood up and tried to calm down. Hope would be safe with Xena, but then… “Didn’t I just hear Xena scream?!” Okay, so maybe everything wasn’t fine.
Turning to face the incensed bard, Goewin fiddled with his medallion nervously, “She didn’t scream so much as call for you. It’s… I’m sure everything will be fine…”
But Gabrielle was already rushing past him, “Oh gods, please let everything be all right!” But everything wasn’t all right; Gabrielle could feel it in the newly empty pit of her stomach. Hear it in the sound of Xena’s voice, clear as day.
Goewin was left with no choice but to follow as they raced through he castle. Gabrielle, the mother, desperate to find her child and friend, and Goewin, the knight, following his duty to protect.
Not surprisingly, Gabrielle reached the small room first. All she saw was Xena kneeling in front of something, head pressed down and to the side, over something. Rushing in, Gabrielle looked for signs of a battle. “Xena? Oh Zeus, what’s wrong?”
The warrior princess’ eyes had been closed, but now they opened, full of unshed tears for the pain her friend was about to go through, and her head lifted. “Oh, Gabrielle…”
As Xena shifted, what was lying on the table in front of her became apparent to the stricken bard. Dashing forward, she skidded around her friend and collapsed against the edge of the table, scooping the deathly still Hope up into her arms as she did so. “Oh… oh… Hope… Hope, my Hope…”
Xena rose shakily and took a step back, eyes tightly closed again, reminding herself that there was no going back. Goewin was alive and Hope was dead. At least this time it wasn’t by Gabrielle’s own hand. Slowly, she spoke, outlining events that would never transpire in any world. “She… she just started choking, couldn’t breathe. I tried to save her… I failed…” Deep breath in, exhale, “Gabrielle, I’m so sorry…”
“Oh, no, no, no, no…. C’mon Hope, breathe for mommy… Hope…” Gabrielle held the still babe against chest, rocked her softly, and tried to ignore the pale ashen tint that was settling into the once lively babe’s skin. The sobs racked through her unexpectedly and loudly.
Head downcast, Xena took a last look at her friend. Trying to decide whether it was better if she stayed and tried to comfort her or if she let it be. Knowing in her heart it would be better if she wasn’t there, Xena edged out the door, past a stricken looking Goewin who had been hanging back at the entrance to the room.
One look at the knight’s face and Xena knew that she didn’t have to ask him to stay there for Gabrielle; he would do all he could. Shaking her head, Xena left the room and the sounds of her sobbing friend, trying to pull her own thoughts together.
~(*)~
He was leaning against the wall to the fortress, staring out into the suspiciously empty woods easily. The lone guard, not at all concerned with any threats that the forest had once had to offer. Without turning, he knew that she was there, interrupting his vigil. “You all right?”
Ignoring his question, Xena leaned back against the door she had just come through. If she never had to go into the castle again, it would be too soon for her to forget. “I don’t know if I made the right decision…”
At this Ares turned, fixed her with a steady gaze, and noted how downtrodden that she seemed. Much more upset than he had seen the warrior princess in a very long time. “You did what you had to.”
Looking up bitterly, Xena sighed, “How do you know?” She wasn’t sure if her wish had been a good idea, and at the least, she wished she wasn’t the only one who knew how it all had turned out before.
Taking several strides forward, Ares closed the gap between them until they were only inches apart. When Xena looked down and away again, he reached forward, tipping her chin up and forcing her to look him in the eyes. Eyebrow raised, Ares inquired, “So it would be better for Hope to kill that knight, you to freak out, Gabrielle to ship her off, and live in guilt about lying to you. Only for Dahak’s demon-spawn to reappear just in time to kill your son, have Gabrielle kill her, then reappear and wreak all sorts of havoc?”
Eyes widening, Xena’s gaze snapped to focus on Ares. She regarded him silently for a second, trying to figure out what sort of joke this was. Finally, she asked, “How do you know?”
Rolling his eyes, Ares let go of Xena and moved back a step, allowing her comfort level to rise instead of pissing her off further. “Please, Xena. A god can’t just mess with the timeline and everybody’s memories and get the gods in there too. How do you think Zeus always figured out when someone went time traveling? Besides, we’re not under his power, even this new ‘one god’ can’t just play with our memories.”
“So, this whole time you knew?” Xena hissed out, momentary anger thankfully distracting her from questions of right and wrong.
Shrugging, Ares decided that being completely truthful was his best option at this point. “Well, yeah. Didn’t know that you remembered though, not at first anyway. And, might I say, if it’s possible, the Fates are more pissed at you now than ever before. Which is pretty bad, considering what happened with you and them last time.”
Shrinking back against the wall, Xena felt tired and old all at once. Between her nice little twenty-some year nap and now the being back in time, she knew so much more and was so much older feeling than ever before. “So, why did you help me?”
“Well, to be honest, all us gods had a meeting about it. The family figured they’d be pretty damn happy actually having a chance to survive this time around.” He shrugged at Xena, knowing that she knew as well as he did that he cared very little about the survival of most of his family. “Besides,” he winked at her, “as far as wishes go, you made a pretty good one.”
Nodding slowly, Xena managed a small smirk. It figured that the gods would hold a meeting over time shifting gears. “I betrayed Gabrielle.”
Coming closer again, Ares squatted down next to Xena and sighed as though greatly pained, “While I really don’t care either way… The bard will be happier. This way she never knows that she spawned a vessel of evil, and instead thinks she had a nice little baby girl.” Running a hand through his hair, Ares asked, “Do you feel better yet? Because I’m not big on this comforting stuff…”
Managing a small smile, Xena nodded again. “Yeah,” she raised an eyebrow, “Not much I can do about it anyway, is there?”
“Nope,” Ares agreed with her quickly, “The Fates have already rewoven the pattern and I don’t see any angels granting life-altering wishes.”
Smiling slightly more, Xena closed her eyes. For here on out it was all new; nothing was up to her anymore than it normally would be. “Thanks,” she wasn’t sure whether she meant for cheering her up, the help, or everything that had ‘never’ happened.
Grinning, Ares couldn’t help but tease, “So, Xena, how’s that one in a billion chance going this time around.”
Opening her eyes, Xena watched as Ares disappeared in a flash of blue light. Sighing, she whispered, “So far, pretty good…”
~(*)~
“And, despite what people said, you were good. And pure. And innocent. You gave me back my hope; you were my Hope… I’ll always love you, Hope.”
Goewin and several others of the knights stood forward in one motion and lit the funeral pyre following the end of Gabrielle’s words. They were silent and somber, none more so than Goewin, who felt the young bard’s loss acutely.
Placing an arm around her crying friend, Xena took a deep breath and began the Amazon funeral dirge that Gabrielle had requested, claiming it was befitting for her daughter, who had technically been an Amazon princess.
It was a haunting melody and Xena could only wish that it would help her get over her part in her best friend’s pain. She was making peace with her decision simply by the fact that Gabrielle had been allowed to stay innocent at least of knowing the evil of her child.
At length the song ended and the knights departed back into their castle, to await the birth of some new savior or demon. Xena stayed standing there, watching the flames with Gabrielle, whose tears would just dry before she began crying anew.
The morning sun was gracing the horizon before the last flames sputtered out, the new dawn light framing Gabrielle’s pained and Xena’s remorseful face. After a moment, Gabrielle turned to her friend, eyes still glistening, and motioned to the brightly colored sky, “She’s at peace.”
Nodding, Xena stroked a few pieces of Gabrielle’s hair out of her eyes and surveyed her friend. Gabrielle was wounded emotionally, but she would pull through. There’d be many chances for her heart to heal. Softly, Xena agreed, “I know,” and prayed that this time Hope would be allowed some peace, having died innocent of murder at least.
Wiping the newest spout of tears from her cheeks, Gabrielle turned towards the forest road, having made her own peace and ready to leave the horrible Britannia. “Do you think we could catch a boat out to Greece today?”
Xena looked down at this soft statement, confused. She looked over her friend carefully as she hurried to follow, “Don’t you want to rest a day or so? I could get us a room…”
Shaking her head softly but resolutely, Gabrielle declined this offer. She placed her hand on Xena’s arm and waited for the warrior to face her. “Goewin is going to guard this site, keep it in Hope’s memory. I just…” she wiped at new tears, determined to get this out, “she’ll always be with me. My Hope. I just want to leave Britannia and its pain behind.”
Xena nodded before turning her gaze back to the road. They walked towards the town in silence, watching as the sun rose fully into the sky through the canopy of trees. The Banshees were most assuredly gone now, their plans foiled.
After the silence had stretched comfortably, Xena took a pained breath and broke it. Unsure whether it was too soon to discuss what she wanted, but knowing that she needed to say something. “Gabrielle?”
Looking back at the thoughtful expression Xena wore, Gabrielle warily asked, “Yeah?”
Nodding behind her, as though to indicate the funeral without saying it, Xena began unsurely, “I was thinking… when we get back to Greece, maybe we could visit the amazons and centaurs again…” she trailed off, realizing that it was probably still too painful for her friend.
Smiling slightly, Gabrielle nodded. “That would be nice.” Wounds were still fresh and everything still hurt, but perhaps time with her tribe and time to mourn would be good for her injured heart.
Almost too quiet to hear, Xena spoke, “I wanted to go see Solan.” It would give Gabrielle time to mourn Hope and Xena time to fix even more mistakes. It seemed that they were never ending, no matter how far back in time she went.
“Oh.” There was a pause as Gabrielle warred with her new emotional wounds and what would be best. Finally she sighed and nodded, “Yeah, that would be good, Xena.”